Thomas and Frank explore a "Strange"-ly familiar film about an ancient sorcerer and a strangely terrible film about an infamous supervillain.
First, Thomas reviews "Doctor Mordrid" (1992). Then, Frank reviews "Kraven the Hunter" (2024).
It's a mysterious superhero Double Feature, and it starts right now!
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Meet Your Double Feature is a double-blind movie review podcast hosted by brothers Thomas and Frank. Thomas is an event producer and broadcaster from Chicago. Frank is an independent filmmaker living in Los Angeles.
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For full episodes, written reviews and more, visit our website at https://www.MeetYourDoubleFeature.com/
"Nate and Moriah in Venice" (which Frank Co-Produced) is now available to stream on Amazon Prime Video! Rent or purchase here: Watch Nate and Moriah in Venice | Prime Video
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Listen to the No Context Cinema Club podcast at: No Context Cinema Club | Film Podcast
Music for tonight's show licensed through Soundstripe
"The Shakedown" by Dresden, The Flamingo
"Soul Tonic" by Cast of Characters
"Sophistikitty" by Cast of Characters
(00:00) Intro
(00:39) Doctor Mordrid (1992)
(43:11) Ad Read: No Context Cinema Club Podcast
(44:27) Kraven the Hunter (2024)
(01:26:06) Final Scores and Wrap-Up
(01:38:22) Outro
00:00:09
Tonight on Meet Your Double feature, a reclusive sorcerer
00:00:13
investigates a string of supernatural robberies in Doctor
00:00:18
Mordred. Then a super powered vigilante
00:00:21
tracks down the men that kidnapped his brother in Craven
00:00:25
the Hunter. It's a mysterious superhero
00:00:28
double feature, and it starts right now.
00:00:39
Hello and welcome to Meet Your Double Feature, a double-blind
00:00:42
movie review podcast. My name is Thomas, joined as
00:00:45
always by my brother Frank. Frank, how are you?
00:00:47
Oh. I'm excited.
00:00:49
I'm excited. He's excited, he's always
00:00:51
excited because the show pretty good, pretty exciting.
00:00:56
Pretty exciting, you could say. We have another back-to-back
00:00:59
movie review in store for you tonight, starting with the blind
00:01:03
recommendation that Frank gave me, which is Doctor Mordred.
00:01:05
And then after our break, we'll be looking at the movie I asked
00:01:07
Frank to watch, 2024's Craven the Hunter, both entries in our
00:01:12
ongoing series talking about forgotten superhero films.
00:01:16
And Frank, I'll say right now, I don't think we could have picked
00:01:19
two more forgotten superhero films.
00:01:23
Oh, totally. I'll, I'll get into that with
00:01:25
Craven. But I want to hear about this.
00:01:27
The good doctor, Doctor Mordred. The good Doctor Mordred, not
00:01:31
Doctor Strange. Although you could be excused
00:01:34
for thinking it's a Doctor Strange movie because he looks
00:01:36
like Doctor Strange and acts like Doctor Strange and was
00:01:39
clearly supposed to be Doctor Strange.
00:01:41
Oh well it it literally from what I read that's the film
00:01:45
began production as a Doctor Strange movie and then partway
00:01:48
through they couldn't get the rights, realized they didn't
00:01:50
have them in the first place and decided to just change the names
00:01:54
of some characters around. It is interesting.
00:01:57
I'm going to get into a little bit of production background
00:02:00
just because it does help give context for what Doctor Mordred
00:02:02
ended up being. But before we get too far in,
00:02:05
because we always start with this, Frank, what caused you to
00:02:08
pick this one for me to watch, given that, like with all of our
00:02:10
films on the show, neither of us has ever actually seen it before
00:02:13
now? I, I did watch a trailer for
00:02:15
this one, which I don't always do, but I, I, I don't remember
00:02:21
how I stumbled across it, but I saw the cast first, which is
00:02:26
something we often will pull from in terms of
00:02:28
recommendations. Like, definitely, you know,
00:02:31
'cause we have the, the the lead is Jeffrey Combs, who I, who I
00:02:34
think I mentioned last time is, is a big Star Trek guy,
00:02:39
recurring Star Trek actor in a lot of the 90s shows, opposite
00:02:44
Brian Thompson. Who is you?
00:02:47
And I would most well know as Shao Khan from the 90s Mortal
00:02:51
Kombat movie, who he himself has also done a lot of recurring
00:02:57
Star Trek characters. Yeah, So that's where I started.
00:03:00
And then I watched the trailer and I was like, oh, wow, this
00:03:03
looks like hokey fun. And somewhere along the way,
00:03:07
too, I saw that it was supposed to be a Doctor Strange movie,
00:03:09
and then it just became its own, like, bootleg version of that.
00:03:13
And that made it sound even more funny to me.
00:03:15
So yeah, that's basically why I I queued this one up for you
00:03:19
because I wanted to see if you also thought it was funny.
00:03:23
Yeah, it's it's an interesting film.
00:03:24
I do think that the cast stands out.
00:03:27
I did look up a lot about the movie's production after
00:03:31
watching it because by the time I was finished, I was like, OK,
00:03:33
this is clearly some sort of very low budget, very small
00:03:39
scope Doctor Strange RIP off. But how did that come to be?
00:03:42
And I did read Frank what you mentioned which is that a lot of
00:03:45
people assume that the production studio Full Moon had
00:03:49
the rights to Doctor Strange but it took so long to get the movie
00:03:51
going and out of pre production that they like lapsed but they
00:03:54
just continued anyway. However, people who worked on
00:03:58
the movie will contest that this is not true and have even gone
00:04:02
as far as to claim that it is not a RIP off of Doctor Strange
00:04:04
at all. Oh, interesting.
00:04:08
OK, Can. What are your thoughts on that?
00:04:12
Yeah, my thought is no, it is a Doctor Strange ripoff.
00:04:15
Their explanation which honestly feels like legalese to me,
00:04:19
although it was in an interview like 20 years later.
00:04:22
Supposedly the person behind Full Moon Studios, Charles Band
00:04:26
I think is the name which Full Moon is like a kind of a
00:04:29
notorious like B movie sci-fi fantasy film studio from like
00:04:33
the 80s and 90s. Some iteration is still around
00:04:35
now, but they made films like Puppet Master and just all these
00:04:40
low budget semi, you know, like horror movies or comedies or
00:04:45
just weird stuff. The kind of thing that you would
00:04:47
see as like direct to video VHS movies, which is what Doctor
00:04:51
Mordred was as well. It just went straight to video.
00:04:54
And supposedly the owner, the producer for all these movies,
00:04:57
Charles Band, was friends with both Stanley and Jack Kirby, who
00:05:01
are like the creative, you know, leads at Marvel for the longest
00:05:05
time. Between the two of them, they
00:05:06
created the majority of the famous like Marvel superhero
00:05:10
characters like Spider Man, the X-Men.
00:05:13
Basically everybody can be attributed to either Stanley or
00:05:15
Jack Kirby directly. And at some point in the late
00:05:18
80s, Full Moon Studios hired Jack Kirby to help them develop
00:05:23
scripts for like theatrical film pitches.
00:05:26
And it was there that Kirby supposedly made a character
00:05:29
called Doctor Mortalis, who later reappeared as Doctor
00:05:33
Mordred. Does that make sense?
00:05:35
Wait, so so not Doctor Strange then?
00:05:38
But that's The funny thing. This is their proof.
00:05:40
They're like, see, we didn't RIP off Doctor Strange.
00:05:43
We just hired one of the guys from Marvel to write a character
00:05:46
for us and he gave us knock off Doctor Strange.
00:05:49
And it's like, it's still a RIP off.
00:05:51
It's still clearly the same thing.
00:05:53
I think it was just that Jack Kirby was trying to get a film
00:05:56
made and just worked with something that he already kind
00:05:58
of had. Because I don't know,
00:06:00
admittedly, I don't know who is credited with inventing Doctor
00:06:03
Strange like the Marvel character, if it was Kirby or
00:06:05
Stanley or somebody else. But obviously there was some
00:06:08
inspiration taken because the the character design and
00:06:12
description and the storytelling is all the same.
00:06:15
The only thing that Full Moon is claiming is we never had the
00:06:18
rights to Doctor Strange. Thus it was not a RIP off.
00:06:21
We just made T MU Doctor Strange on purpose.
00:06:26
It's not, it's not even a very strong argument against, Yeah.
00:06:31
It's I found the dumbest quote that was, I think from the
00:06:35
person credited as the screenwriter for Doctor Mordred,
00:06:39
who also obviously has a vested interest in claiming that this
00:06:43
was not a RIP off because he wrote the film and he was quoted
00:06:46
as saying later on. Like, I don't recall Doc Strange
00:06:49
fighting dinosaur skeletons. And I was like, well, yeah, not
00:06:55
all the time. I'm sure.
00:06:56
Like he he said it as if it was like a case closed kind of
00:06:59
moment. And it's gotcha.
00:07:01
That's pretty granular if you have to go that far to look for
00:07:04
a difference. Which it's funny too because
00:07:07
like pre 2008 you know MCU like most of these Marvel characters,
00:07:14
like nobody would have known them anyway.
00:07:16
Yeah, exactly. I think the DC pantheon of
00:07:19
characters like Batman, Superman had a much stronger grip in pop
00:07:24
culture than than any of these Marvel characters would have at
00:07:27
the time. Probably so.
00:07:29
I mean, I do know that there was like a 1978 licensed Doctor
00:07:33
Strange film, but that one didn't perform very well and
00:07:35
didn't lead anywhere. So I would say even just from
00:07:38
what I can remember, having been born before 2008, the Marvel
00:07:42
people that anyone would have recognized at that time were
00:07:44
Spider Man, Iron Man and Captain America.
00:07:47
That was probably it. Yeah, maybe.
00:07:51
Or like the X-Men, I guess. Maybe 2?
00:07:53
Oh yeah, the X-Men. OK, I'll take it back.
00:07:55
Probably Spider Man and Wolverine would have been the
00:07:56
ones that your average person would be like.
00:07:59
I recognize them from comic books that I know what that is.
00:08:05
Neither of which even compared to like Superman, Batman,
00:08:08
because those were so much more established.
00:08:09
They came about first. And to your point, there were
00:08:12
successful film and TV projects starting from much further back.
00:08:15
So for Marvel's case, Doctor Strange was like a nothing deal
00:08:18
anyway, which is why it's so funny I think because now the
00:08:23
character is known to people, it makes Doctor Mordred a funnier
00:08:27
little RIP off in retrospect. But at the time nobody would
00:08:31
have known. It's just like whatever, wizard
00:08:32
man. That's it.
00:08:34
Wizard Man Yeah, yeah. I didn't realize that this was a
00:08:37
studio known for making kind of like B movies too.
00:08:41
That that that's interesting and fun.
00:08:44
It is interesting. Full Moon has the number.
00:08:47
Like I said, the Puppet Master is one of the most popular ones.
00:08:49
I think they made Doll Man, which is actually on my list as
00:08:52
like a potential pick for this because Doll Man's not even
00:08:55
really a superhero, but he has this title structure of one.
00:08:58
He's just a very small cop. He's like 6 inches tall. 6
00:09:03
inches tall. Well, he's he gets shrunken.
00:09:05
It's like honey I shrunk the police.
00:09:07
Essentially it's like. Oh my goodness that sounds so
00:09:11
dumb. I love it.
00:09:12
Yeah, which is also, and this will be the last bit of context
00:09:15
before I dig into the movie. 1 of the only other places that
00:09:17
Doctor Mordred appears as a character is that there was a
00:09:20
comic book series written in the 20 tense called Doll Man Kills
00:09:25
the Full Moon Universe, where Doll Man, specifically the six
00:09:29
inch tall policeman, fights a bunch of other characters from
00:09:33
other Full Moon Bee movies and Doctor Mordred is just in there
00:09:37
somewhere. Oh heck.
00:09:39
Yes. Why?
00:09:40
Why is he killing? He's a bad cop.
00:09:42
Why is he killing? Him, I don't know.
00:09:43
I have not seen Doll Man. We might have to select him for
00:09:46
her forgotten superheroes darn theme at some point.
00:09:49
But anyway, that's the legacy for who this character is.
00:09:52
I yeah, I never would have expected him to show up anywhere
00:09:56
else. The the fact that he even has
00:09:59
that kind of appearance in the 20 tens is kind of crazy.
00:10:02
It is, it is. It shows like, I think movies
00:10:05
like this, B movies, cult movies, like they leave an
00:10:09
impact on certain kinds of people who then go on to become
00:10:11
artists themselves and we'll just draw on those influences.
00:10:15
It reminds me of how when we talked about Meteor Man a couple
00:10:18
of episodes back, how the villains from that movie, which
00:10:21
did not have a lasting impact, it popped up in like a Miles
00:10:25
Morales Spider Man comic. It's the same thing.
00:10:27
Like somebody somewhere had a had a moment with these films
00:10:30
and then they kind of held on to it as as inspiration.
00:10:33
I mean, I get it. There's definitely really
00:10:35
obscure stuff that you and I will just reference to each
00:10:38
other sometimes and just be like, Remember, Remember spider
00:10:41
riders. I was about to say spider
00:10:43
riders. Like if you would pause for even
00:10:47
half a second I was going to make a joke about spider riders
00:10:50
and that is very telling. That's exactly who I would put
00:10:56
in something like if I was going to put an obscure character in
00:10:59
there, I'd be like, I don't even remember any of the characters
00:11:01
names from that show, but put one of them in there.
00:11:04
Yeah, Doll Man kills the spiders from spider writers.
00:11:07
It's our upcoming comic book. Just like a really sad cover of
00:11:13
one of them holding their spiders like.
00:11:15
No, no. But the spiders were big,
00:11:17
remember? That's how they wrote them.
00:11:19
Yeah, Yeah, I do. I do remember that, You're
00:11:20
right. He does remember that.
00:11:21
We both remember that. Couldn't tell you anything else
00:11:25
about that show or like what they did, anything.
00:11:30
I mean, I'll tell you what they did.
00:11:32
They rode spiders. What else do you need to know
00:11:37
that's it sells itself? That's it.
00:11:39
Anyway, that's my preamble about Doctor Mordred because I think a
00:11:42
lot of people who take a look at the cover are going to be like,
00:11:45
what is this knock off of a Marvel character?
00:11:47
Why did this get made? And the answer is it was just a
00:11:51
cheap B movie that played on an existing idea because they
00:11:56
technically had the work that Jack Kirby had done for what was
00:11:59
Doctor Mortalis. The movie that he was trying to
00:12:02
use to pitch it for never got picked up because that was more
00:12:04
on the scale of like a theatrical release film.
00:12:06
And then Charles Band from Full Moon was just making his little
00:12:09
VHSB movies and was like, eh, whatever, we'll just, we'll use
00:12:12
this for one of our films. Great, good.
00:12:15
Good for them. Good for.
00:12:18
Them So that's like unfortunately, maybe the most
00:12:24
interesting stuff about Doctor Mordred is the context in which
00:12:28
it was made, because as a film it to me, like what I have
00:12:32
written down here is barely a movie.
00:12:35
Oh, that's a. That's an actual note.
00:12:38
Barely. That's a note that I wrote down
00:12:41
is barely a movie, and not because it's a like an
00:12:46
unintelligible mess, like we've talked before about films that
00:12:50
just get lost in editing or they didn't have the footage they
00:12:52
wanted and then don't come together at the end.
00:12:55
But Doctor Mordred, they just weren't even aiming high enough.
00:12:58
They had almost nothing but dialogue, very little action,
00:13:04
very little effects. What they did put on screen is
00:13:08
fairly nice looking. And I think that was almost like
00:13:11
the full moon. MO was like, we're going to make
00:13:13
a really low budget movies that kind of pass as higher budget
00:13:17
movies. And Doctor Mordred kind of falls
00:13:19
into this trap because when it starts you're like, OK, this
00:13:22
looks like a movie and by the time it's over you're like, that
00:13:24
was they didn't have any money. They had $4.00 to make this.
00:13:28
Money. You lied to me.
00:13:29
That wasn't a movie at all. It barely.
00:13:32
So the the other thing I wrote down was this feels like someone
00:13:36
took all of the downbeats of a story and just put them together
00:13:40
and left out everything else. Because there's so many things
00:13:42
that happened that would be nice little breathers in between the
00:13:46
part of the movie where things happen, but you don't get any of
00:13:50
that stuff. This is the Seinfeld of
00:13:51
superhero movies. Like maybe something happens on
00:13:54
the way to the Sanctum. No, nothing happens.
00:13:57
That is so damning. Does he not fight a dinosaur
00:14:01
skeleton? Bones.
00:14:02
I mean, come on. I mean, we could talk about
00:14:05
dinosaur, dinosaur skeleton bones, but that would be
00:14:07
skipping to the exciting third act conclusion.
00:14:09
So we should probably find it back to the beginning.
00:14:12
OK, gotcha. Yeah, so let's not get ahead of
00:14:15
ourselves here. We're going to blow all the good
00:14:16
parts at the beginning. The film opens with energetic
00:14:21
orchestral music playing over an extremely slow pan of a quiet,
00:14:26
dark room. Good.
00:14:29
You know what? I'm sorry.
00:14:29
I'm going to stop you right there.
00:14:30
Have you seen Begonia? No, I have no culture.
00:14:35
I have not seen any new movies. I I, we just watched it recently
00:14:41
and like that movie is, does such an interesting thing with
00:14:46
the score where it plays the most bombastic, like energetic,
00:14:52
lively score over the most mundane scenes.
00:14:56
And I'm like, this is really interesting and I kind of don't
00:15:00
get it. Like, like, I don't know really
00:15:06
what exactly you're trying to evoke here, but it's, it's quite
00:15:10
a choice. So that that just reminded me of
00:15:13
that. But I'm sure this had less.
00:15:16
I don't know, maybe. Maybe that was the same artistic
00:15:19
intention here. I mean, in Begonia, I imagine is
00:15:22
trying to create a sense of like discord or friction when the
00:15:25
movie begins in Doctor Mordred, I think it's we need to score
00:15:29
this with the music we already have in our catalog because it
00:15:33
doesn't fit. I mean, what you're seeing in
00:15:35
this opening pan is the I don't, he doesn't call it the Sanctum
00:15:39
because that's what Doctor Strange's house is called.
00:15:41
But it's clearly that same thing.
00:15:42
It's where Doctor Mordred lives, and it's full of, like,
00:15:46
artifacts and old books, and it's very ornate and kind of
00:15:50
dimly lit. It looks like a cool place to
00:15:52
hang out and read a book, but it just has this kind of like,
00:15:56
jumpy Danny Elfman Batman music playing over it.
00:15:59
And I was like, that doesn't go here.
00:16:01
Like that's not what you're showing me.
00:16:03
That sounds like the Shadow. The Shadow had very Danny Elfman
00:16:06
esque music too. So that's our like immediate
00:16:11
open is I will say too, Doctor Marjorie is like 75 minutes
00:16:15
long. It's possibly the shortest movie
00:16:18
we've covered on the show so far.
00:16:19
And even at that length, it constantly feels like it's
00:16:22
padding for time. Oh, really?
00:16:24
For a second I thought you were about to say he's 75 years old.
00:16:26
And I was like, oh, that's kind of fun.
00:16:29
Actually he might be older than that.
00:16:31
They make a joke about him being like hundreds of years old.
00:16:35
Oh. OK, interesting.
00:16:38
Let's dig into this. Tell me more.
00:16:42
Yeah, so Doctor Mordred is a character.
00:16:45
His full name is Anton Mordred. He is a Sorcerer Supreme.
00:16:50
No, just a sorcerer, just a regular old sorcerer.
00:16:54
I think he specifically says he's an alchemist.
00:16:56
And the only context you have when the movie really begins,
00:16:59
because our cold open is the bad guy we do briefly see after that
00:17:03
opening pan, Shao Khan shows up and is stealing like raw
00:17:10
elements from like an armored truck.
00:17:12
He like brainwashes some armored truck driver to hand over these
00:17:17
materials. Just kind of Mac guffin like he
00:17:19
needs like pure silver or something.
00:17:21
And then we see that the guard is fully brainwashed because
00:17:24
Shao Khan kind of nods at him and he like shoots himself in
00:17:27
the head. So it's immediately like, oh,
00:17:29
spooky bad guy, let's go check in on our hero.
00:17:32
And then we check in on Mordred and he's just hanging out in, I
00:17:34
kid you not, this room I just described is in an apartment
00:17:38
building. OK, like a big apartment
00:17:41
building or? Like a small apartment building,
00:17:46
nice, nice, cool. Which is so bizarre and I think
00:17:50
was only done to create opportunities for him to talk to
00:17:54
other people. Because at the beginning of the
00:17:57
story, you see that he has his apartment, which is very
00:17:59
suspicious. Like if you go in there, he has
00:18:02
like 16 monitors up on the wall, like it's the bat cave.
00:18:05
And he is, I, I kid you not, recording the broadcast TV news
00:18:10
24/7 onto VHS tapes and just putting them on his wall because
00:18:15
I guess he's low tech Batman. Well, I mean, he's a
00:18:19
preservationist, you know, that's, that's lost media right
00:18:22
there. Like, where are those tapes,
00:18:24
Doctor Mordred? Where?
00:18:25
Are those tapes? Yeah.
00:18:27
It's just funny to me because I think the implication he sees
00:18:31
like surveilling the earth in case he needs to go stop a crime
00:18:34
or something, but a he never goes and stops any crimes.
00:18:37
He only ever deals with like the main threat of the story.
00:18:40
And also it's like you're a magic man and you're just
00:18:42
sitting here rewinding VHS tapes and going to the store and
00:18:46
buying those like blank 8 hour tapes that everybody had.
00:18:49
It's just so incongruous right off the bat and almost like an
00:18:53
amusing way. But all this is in his apartment
00:18:55
and right outside the door is just like some old lady and then
00:18:58
down the door from her is like his love interest for the movie.
00:19:00
And I'm like, why are you here? Why aren't you in a better
00:19:03
place? What like what city are we in?
00:19:07
Is this like New York? We are in New York.
00:19:09
That's a good question. The initial, like, villain
00:19:12
sequence where the takes the silver from the armored truck
00:19:14
happens in Rio, which we know because they had one shot of an
00:19:18
establishing shot of that big statue in Rio.
00:19:20
And they're like, well, that's it.
00:19:22
There's goes the budget for the movie.
00:19:23
Now back to New York City. Yeah.
00:19:24
Where Dominic Toretto is. Dominic.
00:19:27
Dominic Toretto, Yeah. Like they did Jason Statham
00:19:31
saying Dominic Turreto specific. That's how everybody says it,
00:19:34
right? We all saw what is it, Furious 7
00:19:38
or they're ret cutting the end of Fast and Furious 3 and he's
00:19:42
like Dominic Turreto, you don't know me.
00:19:46
This whole show is just me doing voices and that's not who I am.
00:19:50
It is now. It is now.
00:19:53
It's just because Doctor Mordred is so boring.
00:19:55
Like I was perfectly awake. I put this movie on at like 8:00
00:20:00
PM yesterday and by the time it was over, I was bone tired.
00:20:04
Like it's not even that long, but it just is so slow moving
00:20:10
and nothing happens. Like we introduce that Doctor
00:20:14
Mordre lives in this apartment and is waiting for the return of
00:20:18
the villain that we just saw. Like supposedly he.
00:20:23
They might be brothers or just friends, like they had some
00:20:26
connection in the past. And for the past 100 plus years,
00:20:28
Mordred's been waiting in New York City just in case the
00:20:31
villain ever breaks out of like space jail and comes to take
00:20:35
over the world, which is immediately countered by just
00:20:39
thinking, why don't you just go wait by the prison?
00:20:43
Wait, yeah. Where is it though?
00:20:44
Is it in space? It's space jail.
00:20:47
There's only two locations in the whole movie, really.
00:20:49
There's his apartment and this set that is essentially outer
00:20:53
space jail. Like, it's not on Earth.
00:20:54
They don't give it a name that I can recall.
00:20:56
But at a couple of points, Mordred will travel through a
00:20:59
portal inside his apartment to go visit this, like, rundown
00:21:03
jail, which he later says is where he put the bad guy 100
00:21:06
years ago. But then, rather than watching
00:21:08
over him in jail, he goes to Earth so that he can look for
00:21:12
signs that maybe the bad guy has escaped.
00:21:15
He's got to watch the news, man. He's got to see what's going on.
00:21:18
I. Think that Mordred is slacking
00:21:21
on the job? He's quiet quitting his
00:21:22
Sorcerer's Supreme job. He's just like, they're like,
00:21:26
don't you want to stay in this rundown uncle prison and make
00:21:28
sure that everybody's safe? And he's like, no, I have to go
00:21:31
try all the latest pizzas down there.
00:21:34
Pizzas. What if he's?
00:21:35
Trying to get at them through their pizzas.
00:21:39
It's what was that? What was it's like that that one
00:21:42
Canadian comedy you had me watch where like the lead detective
00:21:45
was just going to like the strip clubs and stuff because he's
00:21:48
like, maybe the bad guy was here.
00:21:50
Like, that's Doctor Mordred. That's basically what Mordred is
00:21:55
doing because it doesn't make any sense.
00:21:57
Like they show you that he's the one who put Shao Khan in prison,
00:22:00
which by the way, Shao Khan's name I think is Cabal, which
00:22:03
sounds so similarly dumb that I'm just calling him Shao Khan.
00:22:07
I think Cabal is a different Mortal Kombat character.
00:22:10
Also. I was going to say I'm looking.
00:22:12
I was confused. They might be brothers because I
00:22:14
was, I'm looking at the cast here and it says Jeffrey Combs,
00:22:17
Doctor Mordred. And then Brian Thompson, who is
00:22:20
Shaw Khan, says Brian Thompson, Doctor Mordred.
00:22:22
So I don't know if that's just a mistake, but.
00:22:26
That is a mistake. He's not a doctor.
00:22:29
Is Doctor Mordred even a doctor? Does he have a PhD?
00:22:32
Great question. Doctor Mordred is a like
00:22:36
criminal psychiatrist on top of being sorcerer, not supreme.
00:22:41
He occasionally gives lectures of essentially trying to
00:22:44
convince regular humans. Like hey, you should probably be
00:22:47
more considerate of like supernatural forces when you're
00:22:49
trying to profile criminals because some of these people who
00:22:53
you think are insane, if they're operating under the logic of
00:22:56
like Satanism or voodoo or something, you should at least
00:22:59
know how those things work. It's very broad.
00:23:02
It's only ever introduced so that he can meet his love
00:23:05
interest character. Samantha Hunt is the character's
00:23:09
name because she works as a consultant for the police.
00:23:12
So like every new plot thing is just to get to the next plot
00:23:16
thing. It doesn't really feel like it's
00:23:18
building any character for for Mordred.
00:23:21
I mean, we only got 75 minutes, man.
00:23:23
There's a lot of we. Only got 75 minutes and we only
00:23:25
really shot for about 40 of them.
00:23:29
I just like, I'm trying to think of what other interesting stuff
00:23:32
even takes place in the movie because you could summarize it
00:23:34
all so quickly. It's like there's a case of
00:23:37
recent robberies that have unexplained motives, where it
00:23:41
seems like like the armored truck guy at the beginning,
00:23:43
people are like trusted employees in these high security
00:23:46
places are helping someone steal valuable minerals.
00:23:50
Mordred immediately recognizes that this is the plan of Cabal
00:23:54
because he knows what his plan has been the whole time should
00:23:57
he ever escaped prison. So he's trying to figure out how
00:23:59
to stop these robberies before he finds all the materials that
00:24:01
he needs, or else he will do some villain plot of like
00:24:05
summoning demons to Earth and taking it over.
00:24:07
Along the way, he talks to Cabal like twice and talks to Samantha
00:24:14
Hunt like twice. And then I think like the entire
00:24:17
second act of the film is that the police arrest Mordred
00:24:21
because they think he's committing the robberies.
00:24:23
And there's like a 20 minute part where he's trying to
00:24:26
convince Sam to let him out of prison so he can go save the
00:24:28
world. And she's like, now he's like,
00:24:31
come on. And then she's like, no.
00:24:32
And then she does. Wait a minute, Wait a minute.
00:24:37
Like who? Who is this guy?
00:24:39
Like he could do magic. How did he become?
00:24:42
Oh yeah, yeah. Let's talk powers.
00:24:44
So I like talking powers. That's my favorite part of this
00:24:47
season. It never makes any sense.
00:24:49
Mordred and Cabal were born somewhere that is not Earth but
00:24:52
does not have a name. I guess they're just from
00:24:54
somewhere else as kids. They both had like magical
00:24:57
powers because they were alchemists, the bad guy child.
00:25:01
Show Khan always just wanted to take over the world and Mordred
00:25:06
didn't, and so they became at odds.
00:25:08
They fought, he put Show Khan in jail and then went to Earth in
00:25:12
case Show Khan ever broke free because he knew he still wanted
00:25:15
to take over the world. That's it.
00:25:17
There's no other nuance, no other context.
00:25:19
That's the whole back story. So they're from a, they're from
00:25:23
not Earth, but he wants to take over Earth specifically.
00:25:27
Why does he not want to take over where he's from?
00:25:30
Because they didn't write what that is like.
00:25:34
There is no other place. Like there's a place where the
00:25:37
jail is. That's it.
00:25:39
It's a phantom zone. Is is he in the Phantom Zone?
00:25:42
He might as well be in the Phantom Zone.
00:25:43
I will say this is a weird pull, but there's an establishing shot
00:25:46
of the like space jail, which is this like floating structure
00:25:49
just out in a void somewhere. But they always show up from
00:25:52
really far back. And the shape of it and the
00:25:54
colors. It looks like the Hyrule Castle
00:25:57
stage from Super Smash Brothers. Like that's like off in the
00:26:01
distance. That's what it looks like.
00:26:03
It looks like it's that shape because you know this, I'm
00:26:05
talking like the early Super Smash Brothers games.
00:26:07
There's like Hyrule Castle stage that's this like big map that's
00:26:10
kind of just like a giant floating rock because you could
00:26:12
fall off the bottom. Yeah, yeah, it.
00:26:15
Just looks like that. It looks like he's being kept in
00:26:17
Hyrule Castle, but that place never gets a name.
00:26:20
There's only one person there who's not Mordred or the bad
00:26:23
guy. They say at one point there were
00:26:25
other like security guards but by the time Mordred goes there
00:26:27
in the movie they've all been killed because the bad guy did
00:26:29
escape. Which is just an excuse to only
00:26:32
hire 1 actor to play the prison guard.
00:26:34
Yeah, yeah, yeah, of course. Yeah, yeah.
00:26:38
Some clear budget limitations, unbelievable budget limitations,
00:26:42
which is why I say this is not a movie.
00:26:44
Nothing happens. Like there's no set pieces.
00:26:47
There's no dialogue to speak of either.
00:26:50
Like we mentioned that both of these guys are Star Trek alums.
00:26:53
If this was Star Trek level where it was kind of just like a
00:26:56
play that was really heavy on dialogue and like theming, that
00:27:00
would be fine, but they didn't write a good script either.
00:27:02
It's just 75 minutes of sleepy Mordred time.
00:27:08
I, I guess I'm still wondering. I mean, it sounds like they
00:27:11
maybe didn't give us a lot to, to really delve into it too
00:27:15
much, but like they're, they're just magic people from another
00:27:19
world. Like do the other people from
00:27:21
that other world also know magic or are they outliers in that
00:27:24
case too like. That would be a great question
00:27:28
if they had answered it, because there are no other people.
00:27:30
Like at one point. This is a good example.
00:27:33
In the bottom of the second act, Mordred has been trying to
00:27:36
convince Samantha Hunt to let him out of jail for like 20
00:27:38
minutes, and she won't do it. So he does like a magic thing so
00:27:42
that he could show her images of his past, both to prove that he
00:27:46
is a real sorcerer and to demonstrate the danger.
00:27:49
And so he's trying to explain, like there once were these two
00:27:52
young boys who both had magical powers, and he's talking about
00:27:55
himself and the villain. And you cut to these two young
00:27:59
boys, like just sitting in a room playing.
00:28:01
And you would assume that this seemed to be almost like a quick
00:28:03
montage flashback. But he talks for maybe 30 plus
00:28:08
seconds over just an uninterrupted, like, slow pants
00:28:11
shot of the two kids on the ground.
00:28:13
They had nothing. They had nothing to show,
00:28:16
nothing to cut to. They didn't have anything to
00:28:18
depict in the flashback. So by the time it's over, you've
00:28:21
literally not learned a single scrap of new information, he's
00:28:26
just restating. We're both magic.
00:28:28
I good magic, he bad magic I mean.
00:28:34
Look, it's a, it's a second screen experience, you know,
00:28:38
people that won't be confused. So it's really ahead of its time
00:28:44
if you think about it that way. This.
00:28:46
This movie felt akin to like, do you ever go on like YouTube and
00:28:51
just put on like relaxing fireplace video and it's just 10
00:28:56
hours of like a crackling fireplace so you could pretend
00:28:58
you're somewhere nice. Instead of your apartment full
00:29:02
of monitors. Apartment full of monitors yeah
00:29:07
like that's the level and and with these videos they'll often
00:29:10
have like a looping background image that like kind of looks
00:29:12
like it has some movement to it and maybe for like a few seconds
00:29:15
you'll look up at it and be like what do they got going on in
00:29:17
there and then you look away because you're doing something
00:29:19
else that is as much as Mordred would be useful for you just put
00:29:23
it on and every now and again go what's that doctor up to and
00:29:27
then you go about your day. Like I'm going to, I'm going to
00:29:31
watch the Pit instead. That's he's a better doctor.
00:29:34
I'm going to watch the Pit. Yeah, exactly.
00:29:36
It's crazy. In case I did not cover it much
00:29:40
yet, Doctor Morgan's powers are very vague.
00:29:42
He, like Doctor Strange, has a magical amulet that he wears
00:29:45
around his neck. That's the source of all of his
00:29:47
power. But the only things we ever see
00:29:49
him do are freeze people, like temporarily so that he can run
00:29:54
away from them. Or I think he summons like a
00:29:58
fake gun to make someone think he has a gun and that's about
00:30:03
it. That's so lame.
00:30:06
It's like so you can do magic and the best you can do is
00:30:10
pretend to have a gun like. Yeah, pretty much I.
00:30:14
Mean that's something any normal person could have.
00:30:16
Exactly. He's he might as well do the
00:30:18
thing where you put your hand in like your coat pocket to pretend
00:30:20
you have a gun. Yeah.
00:30:22
That's 90% of the movie. Like there's no magic.
00:30:24
The only thing that gets repeated is that like I'm going
00:30:26
to free someone in place thing because that's how he gets out
00:30:30
of jail too. As he convinces Sam Hunt to do
00:30:32
that for him. He's like, oh, the the magic
00:30:35
amulet by the way, you don't need to be skilled to use it.
00:30:37
There's just a button and if you press the button, it'll freeze
00:30:39
someone in place. So.
00:30:41
This guy doesn't even know any magic.
00:30:43
He's a bit. Phony anything, The only
00:30:45
exception, and we're here now. This is the main event.
00:30:48
After that exciting 1st 60 minutes, we're at the dinosaur
00:30:52
skeletons. Now you better listen.
00:30:56
You could pay for the whole seat, but you're only going to
00:30:58
need the edge for this next part.
00:31:01
Cool. I'm sorry, I'm just trying to
00:31:04
hype it up. So the final thing that Cabal
00:31:08
needs is the Philosopher's Stone, which, yes, is the name
00:31:14
of the first Harry Potter book. I wasn't going to say it.
00:31:16
I wasn't going to say anything. It's the first Harry Potter
00:31:19
book, at least the UK version. Philosopher's Stone.
00:31:21
It has some historical context. I don't know what it is.
00:31:24
I think it turns things into gold.
00:31:25
Anyway. He knows Mordred knows that it's
00:31:27
at the Cosmopolitan Museum in New York City, and he knows that
00:31:33
the bad guy is already physically there to steal it.
00:31:36
And so he tells Sam Hunt, I can't get there in time, which
00:31:39
he literally says is because of, quote, traffic.
00:31:42
That's his big obstacle. I can't go stop the bad guy in
00:31:44
person because it's New York City and there's traffic.
00:31:47
And so. Which is true, but so pathetic.
00:31:51
It is extremely pathetic. She even says she's like, what
00:31:55
are you going to do, fly? And then he looks at her like we
00:31:58
don't have money for fly. We cut the fly so.
00:31:59
Instead, shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up.
00:32:02
Instead, he just projects his astral form to the museum so
00:32:08
that he's not physically there, but the actor's there.
00:32:10
And he's like, there is a spirit essentially.
00:32:12
And then the the following interaction doesn't really make
00:32:14
a lot of sense because Shao Khan is like, you can't stop me.
00:32:18
You're not really here. And then Mordred says, I may not
00:32:21
be here, but I can still cast a spell.
00:32:24
And so he shoots a spell in like sense of flying through a wall,
00:32:27
and I'm like, OK, why does it even matter if you're there
00:32:30
then? That's the thing you'd be afraid
00:32:32
of you doing anyway. It's it's actually better that
00:32:35
you're not there because then he can't do anything back to you.
00:32:38
Exactly. So this is a huge upgrade.
00:32:41
This is such good meta gaming from wardrobe.
00:32:43
He's like, oh, I can just send my invincible astral form and
00:32:45
shoot lightning bolts. That's more than I did as a
00:32:48
human man. And then I guess that somehow
00:32:50
leads to Shao Khan deciding I'm going to use my magic to bring a
00:32:56
dinosaur skeleton inside the museum to life.
00:32:59
Not to harm Mordred, but to harm some security guards because
00:33:03
it'll make Mordred sad. Not like distract him, it'll
00:33:07
just it'll just upset him. He doesn't have a goal.
00:33:11
There's no thought to any of this.
00:33:12
It's not really like a clever sequence.
00:33:14
He's just like, Oh yeah, what if I killed that security guard?
00:33:18
And then Mordred's solution is what if I summoned the other
00:33:21
dynoskeleton to fight your dynoskeleton?
00:33:24
Oh, OK, All right, now we're talking now.
00:33:27
There's 2 now. We're talking and you're
00:33:28
wondering how they do this on their $4.00 budget.
00:33:30
Once again, second episode in a row, we have some very adorable
00:33:34
stop motion animations. Yeah, yeah, of course, of course
00:33:37
it had to be of. Course, yeah, I did stop motion.
00:33:41
And then it's just I'm so I'm getting tired of even thinking
00:33:43
about it because it's so boring. This happens and then the bad
00:33:48
guy, once again, it's like, OK, cool, your Dino beat my Dino,
00:33:51
but you still can't stop me. You're not really here.
00:33:54
And then he goes to like, finish this spell that will summon all
00:33:57
of these demons. And for half a second you see
00:34:00
the demons he's about to summon. They're also stop motion.
00:34:02
They're very, they're very cute. And then Mordred just goes like,
00:34:05
you haven't won yet and then uses the Dino skeleton that he
00:34:09
had from a second ago to impale the bad guy and he kills him.
00:34:12
And that's it. That's the movie.
00:34:15
Uh oh. OK, no, that's that abrupt, this
00:34:17
is. Wow, it is that abrupt.
00:34:20
They're joking, they're laughing about their Dino skeletons
00:34:22
fighting each other, and I guess the bad guy never stops to think
00:34:24
that that is a concern to him. And then Mordred announces he's
00:34:28
about to attack him and the guy doesn't get out of the way and
00:34:31
just dies. I mean, that's kind of on him.
00:34:35
You know it's. Kind of on him.
00:34:36
He gave a fair warning. He let him know he's like, I'm
00:34:38
gonna get you, I'm gonna get you I'm.
00:34:40
Gonna get you, and then the guy's like, what's he going to
00:34:42
do, get me? And then he got caught.
00:34:46
That's that's all idiots. So then that's the end of the
00:34:56
the threat. After that Mordred just leaves.
00:35:01
Like he goes back to his love interest girlfriend and he gets
00:35:05
called away by his superior who is just a pair of floating
00:35:09
eyeballs in space. Just the eyeballs, just the
00:35:14
eyeballs, just floating eyes. And he's just like, I got to go
00:35:18
now I've given my identity away. I have to leave Earth.
00:35:21
And she's like, well, what will I do without you?
00:35:22
And he's like, well you should watch over my cool apt I.
00:35:26
Know you're lying, he tells her to watch the monitors.
00:35:29
He. Tells her to watch over his
00:35:30
bird. His bird, OK, Is he going to
00:35:33
come back or she's like, do I just got to take care of this
00:35:36
bird now? Like, do I have to pay your
00:35:37
rent? Like what's going on here?
00:35:38
Oh, my God, I'm sorry, I forgot. So they make a point early on of
00:35:42
being like, nobody here knows who the landlord is because
00:35:44
they're never around. And then in the second act of
00:35:47
the movie, Sam Hunt is like, why do you have my rent check
00:35:50
sitting on your night stand? And then he's like, oh, I'm the
00:35:53
landlord of this building. That's how I get away with it
00:35:55
being like a secret base. But it's like, OK, you have
00:36:00
enough money to own a property, but you let random people live
00:36:04
in it who could easily find out that you're a sorcerer.
00:36:07
New York's expensive man It's. Just so lame.
00:36:13
He's such a loser. Like, yeah, he doesn't have
00:36:17
enough money for a bat cave even though he's been around for 200
00:36:20
years. He puts everything on VHS tapes
00:36:23
and then he can't make it through traffic to fight crime,
00:36:26
so he just throws a dinosaur at a guy which.
00:36:31
Proved very effective though. Extremely.
00:36:34
You didn't have to say the embarrassing part about how you
00:36:37
can't get through traffic. You could have pretended Dr.
00:36:39
Mordred. You could have protect.
00:36:40
Your plan, you know. You could have been like not to
00:36:43
worry this is literally 0 downside.
00:36:45
I'm just going to go over there as a force ghost.
00:36:48
I was going to say, yeah, it was starting to sound like the end
00:36:51
of whatever Star Wars movie that was where Luke's force ghost
00:36:56
shows up at the end. And.
00:36:58
Does nothing. That's it.
00:37:00
I mean, I you were asking, does she stay at his apartment
00:37:03
forever too? We jump ahead like 6 months and
00:37:06
she's sitting in the apartment alone talking to his pet crow
00:37:10
and she says out loud to him, like, man, I'd rather not be
00:37:13
spending Christmas alone. But I guess I'm just going to
00:37:15
drink eggnog and watch It's a Wonderful Life again, which I
00:37:19
mean, fair, that's fair game. We do that all the time.
00:37:22
But and then wardrobe just comes back.
00:37:25
It's just like the next scene. He just comes back and he's
00:37:27
like, I think the last line of the movie is he's trying to
00:37:30
cheer her up because he's like, now why don't we drink some
00:37:33
eggnog and watch our movie? Which means that Doctor Mordred
00:37:37
is a movie that ends with an invitation for the audience to
00:37:40
go watch a better movie. Which also, this is like the
00:37:44
third or fourth time that It's a Wonderful Life has like been
00:37:47
mentioned or appeared in one of the movies we've watched on the
00:37:50
show. It's just like is constantly
00:37:53
referenced in other movies. I was hoping he was going to
00:37:56
come back at the end and just like take the rent checks off
00:38:00
the table and then leave again. Your rent is overdue.
00:38:04
And then he's like, what? I thought, OK.
00:38:06
And then he just goes and gets pizza at the end.
00:38:08
Yeah. Yeah, that's it.
00:38:12
I've told you everything. Like, normally we leave some
00:38:14
stuff out because we can't tell you every single thing that
00:38:17
happens or we don't want to spoil the ending.
00:38:19
That's the whole movie. You've heard it, you've seen it.
00:38:21
That's it. Wow, that was, that was really
00:38:24
good, yeah. Great.
00:38:26
Right. This feels like quite the quite
00:38:35
the rug pull type movie where it's just like hey, hey guys,
00:38:41
listen it's 1992 you've never heard of Doctor Strange.
00:38:45
But like what if also instead Doctor Mordred?
00:38:48
Am I right? And you're like, cool, what does
00:38:50
he do? And it's like nothing.
00:38:54
Nothing at all. It'd be cool if he had a gun.
00:38:57
Right, but he doesn't be cool if he had a gun.
00:38:59
He has a fake gun. He's he's your landlord.
00:39:01
Does that make? Does that endear you to him?
00:39:05
Good. All right, great.
00:39:07
Yeah, thank you for that. 10 out of 10 out of 10, Doctor Mordred.
00:39:11
I guess we'll get into scores later.
00:39:14
Do you have any questions? Is there any?
00:39:16
Did I? Do you feel like I painted the
00:39:17
picture of Doctor Mordred? It's just it just sounds very
00:39:26
like still kind of funny, but just like very unfortunately
00:39:32
short and pointless. And like, ultimately I like I I
00:39:37
will get into it, but I kind of feel I have similar thoughts
00:39:40
about the movie I watched where during like while watching it,
00:39:46
you're just kind of like, who is this for?
00:39:48
Like what are we even like? Why are we?
00:39:50
Why are we even pretending like? What?
00:39:52
Why are? Yeah, nobody needs this in their
00:39:54
life. Film is entertainment, But
00:39:57
theoretically, there's supposed to be some value, even if the
00:40:00
value is entertainment. And this one just doesn't offer
00:40:05
almost anything. Like, I'm trying to balance this
00:40:08
out with a couple of, like, bright spots in the movie.
00:40:11
The only things I could say are that the love interest character
00:40:14
Sam Hunt. Is treated as just a person.
00:40:18
And so often we watch these older films like the female lead
00:40:22
is just treated as like a sex object or like a, you know, a
00:40:25
damsel. And they just have a lot of like
00:40:27
boring trophy elements to that story where Sam Hunt is just
00:40:31
like treated just, you know, a smart, capable adult woman in
00:40:37
the narrative. Like, you know what?
00:40:38
That's a very low bar, but at least we didn't have that
00:40:40
problem on top of everything else.
00:40:42
I mean, she sounds better than Doctor Mordred.
00:40:44
Just give her that amulet thing and her eggnog and just let her
00:40:47
loose on New York City to stop crime or whatever.
00:40:51
Yeah, she'd probably do a better job.
00:40:52
She does. Amusingly, like, they specify
00:40:56
that the amulet doesn't hurt the person that you use it on if you
00:40:59
freeze them in place. So that's how he's trying to
00:41:01
convince her, Like, oh, it's OK. I just need you to, like, they
00:41:04
took it for me when I was arrested.
00:41:06
I need you to go into the lab room and, like, use it to
00:41:09
escape. Don't worry, you won't hurt
00:41:10
anybody. But then it's like a joke.
00:41:13
The lab guy is drinking something when she activates it.
00:41:16
And so in order to show that he's frozen, you just see the
00:41:18
drink, like, pouring down his face while he's like, still.
00:41:21
And I was like, well, she might have killed that guy.
00:41:24
He's going to drown by the time he goes back up.
00:41:26
Yeah, she got him. Still got to be careful with
00:41:28
that amulet. Still got to be careful.
00:41:30
That's my like alternate ending version is where he just comes
00:41:33
in. She she's like you said it
00:41:35
wouldn't hurt anybody and he's like, I mean, you got to use
00:41:37
some common sense. Sam, come.
00:41:41
On think about it, does anybody, does anybody even like regular
00:41:48
Doctor Strange, honestly, like. Interesting.
00:41:52
Interesting, is that anyone's favorite?
00:41:54
Like even now? Like I feel like even the MCU
00:41:57
kind of realized, like I feel like people like his sidekick
00:42:00
long more than him. So like, you know.
00:42:03
Works as a plot device character in other people's stories just
00:42:08
fine. I think all of the stuff he does
00:42:11
in like Avengers End Game and Infinity War totally fine.
00:42:15
As a person who has to sell you on a property himself at No, not
00:42:19
at all. Right.
00:42:21
Like I feel like on paper he should be interesting just like
00:42:24
superhero magic man, but like actually no actually really lame
00:42:29
and boring honestly. Yeah, now imagine that, but more
00:42:34
lame and boring. Yeah, yeah, well, I'm glad you
00:42:41
loved Doctor Mordred. I you.
00:42:42
Know, yeah, really good, not a good, really browsing feel
00:42:46
strongly about it and on that high note it's just really good
00:42:50
stuff. We're going to move into our
00:42:51
intermission now. Good.
00:42:54
Good, great, good, good. I feel good.
00:43:03
That's it. See you in a minute.
00:43:11
OK, Taking a moment here during our intermission again this week
00:43:14
to shout out another podcast out there that Frank and I are fans
00:43:17
of and wanted to recommend to you all as well.
00:43:20
If you're enjoying our light hearted movie chats then why not
00:43:23
check out the No Context Cinema Club, a show where a culturally
00:43:27
naive xenophobe attempts to rewrite Hollywood history one
00:43:30
movie at a time. Each week the imaginative Rob is
00:43:34
challenged to create an alternative version of a famous
00:43:36
film, armed only with the title and the often weaponized clues
00:43:40
that his Co host Kev provides for him.
00:43:43
Will Rob's work be a plot of cinematic genius or simply
00:43:46
descend into the deranged ramblings of a lunatic?
00:43:49
Only one thing's for certain, he'll definitely try and force
00:43:51
in a montage or two along the way.
00:43:54
So again, if you're in the mood for a more lighthearted movie
00:43:56
chat much like our own on Meet Your Double Feature, why not try
00:43:59
out the Nocontext Cinema Club, available now on your podcast
00:44:03
provider of choice? Frank and I are both big fans of
00:44:06
No Context Cinema Club, so I wanted to give a special shout
00:44:08
out to Rob and Kev. Their show launched only a
00:44:11
couple of months back, but they have already covered almost a
00:44:14
dozen different movie pitches and it's a whole ton of fun.
00:44:17
If you enjoy the comedy side of what we do here on Meet Your
00:44:19
Double Feature, you'll definitely get a lot out of No
00:44:22
Context Cinema Club, so thanks again for going to check them
00:44:25
out. OK, back now from the other side
00:44:31
of the break, Frank. Following that thrilling
00:44:35
breakdown of every single frame of Doctor Mordred, we turn now
00:44:38
to the film I asked you to cover for tonight's episode, the most
00:44:42
recent film we've ever discussed on our main program, 2024's
00:44:47
Craven the Hunter. What?
00:44:50
What was that? What was Craven the Hunter?
00:44:52
What was? No, you tell me.
00:44:55
You got it. You got to tell me.
00:44:56
Oh, OK. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I.
00:44:57
Got to tell you. So I as I recall I was looking
00:45:02
at the Sony, what do they call it?
00:45:03
I think the official name is the Sony Spider Man universe, which
00:45:07
is the Spider Man universe? Yes, SSU without Spider Man,
00:45:13
which is kind of missing when one of your 3 letters isn't in
00:45:16
it. So they're just making
00:45:19
standalone films with some loose connecting threads mostly about
00:45:22
spider man villains. The most prolific is the Venom
00:45:25
movies which had a whole trilogy and then there was like Morbius,
00:45:29
which was like a a meme because of how hard it flopped.
00:45:32
And then even like Madame Webb was kind of a meme before it
00:45:34
came out. And then people forgot Craven
00:45:36
came and went and I swear it's not even a real film because
00:45:40
dude, I, I didn't hear anything about it.
00:45:42
I didn't hear good or bad or funny or not funny.
00:45:45
Like if you told me that this whole movie was just a poster on
00:45:48
a wall I I would believe it IA. 100% agree, I watched this movie
00:45:53
and I still don't believe it exists.
00:45:55
Like this, this might be the most forgotten of superhero
00:46:01
movies for for this season's premise.
00:46:03
I forgot this movie like in real time as I was watching it.
00:46:09
Like the credit set, you're just like, is something starting?
00:46:12
What's happening? It's like memento, I was like,
00:46:15
is somebody chasing me? Like how did I get here?
00:46:18
Every free set, every time you've seen changes, it's like.
00:46:21
But who is that man? What?
00:46:23
What? It's so strange.
00:46:26
And you said that, you know, you brought up the SSU.
00:46:30
This is the last this killed that whole thing that that's
00:46:33
done now because of. Oh, really?
00:46:34
Yeah. Wait, even though so even though
00:46:38
they're making another spider man with that same spider man,
00:46:41
none of us, none of us is part of it.
00:46:43
It's all dead. Well, OK, I don't know.
00:46:46
I mean, I really, really doubt the only person I could see from
00:46:51
from these movies making an appearance would be Tom Hardy.
00:46:54
Maybe, but in terms of like Sony making their own series of
00:47:00
Spider Man movies, Craven was like the last straw.
00:47:04
We're not doing this anymore. I wonder if that is just
00:47:08
exhaustion from failure after failure and just not making any
00:47:12
money, or if there was something particular about Craven that
00:47:14
just really pissed everybody off.
00:47:17
Well, I think it it it pissed Sony off that it was a horrible
00:47:21
mom. This was the worst performing
00:47:24
Sony slash Marvel movie out of all of them.
00:47:28
And it was like it was like a big bomb.
00:47:30
I don't, I don't have the exact numbers, but like the I was
00:47:33
reading that like the budget got inflated because and part part
00:47:37
of the reason I think nobody saw this movie or it came and went
00:47:40
without anyone noticing was because it was originally slated
00:47:43
for like a January 2023 release and then it got delayed and then
00:47:48
it got delayed a second time for even longer because of the
00:47:52
strikes that were happening. So.
00:47:55
OK. It didn't actually wind up
00:47:57
releasing until December 2024. So this is like tail end of 2024
00:48:04
this movie came out. I personally don't remember ever
00:48:07
seeing any advertising for it when it was actually released.
00:48:11
That's why I was like, I remember they were going to make
00:48:14
a Craven movie back in like 2023 or 2022 even when they might
00:48:19
have released the first trailer, but by the time the movie
00:48:22
actually came out, it was like, I feel like nobody even knew
00:48:25
that it existed. It sounds like maybe that's just
00:48:28
like a Hollywood budgeting thing.
00:48:30
Like they had long missed the window where they had allocated
00:48:34
money to promote the film. And by the time they could, you
00:48:37
know, shoot it into theaters, maybe they literally just dumped
00:48:40
it. And we're like, whatever.
00:48:41
I mean, it exists. It has to do something, but
00:48:43
we're not going to spend any more money on it.
00:48:46
Yeah, like, I'm almost surprised this one didn't get the like,
00:48:50
oh, is it like there was like a Batgirl movie or something that
00:48:54
like Warner Brothers just like, like, made the movie and then
00:48:59
just, like, wrote the whole thing off and never released it?
00:49:02
Oh yeah, I think it was Batwoman, which is a version of
00:49:04
Batman I've never even heard of. But it was completely finished,
00:49:08
Effects were done, post production was done, and then
00:49:10
they they shelved it because they could make more money
00:49:13
writing it off as like a tax thing.
00:49:15
Yeah, yeah, It's like the movie The producers or the they they
00:49:19
make. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
00:49:22
exactly. Yeah, I'm, I'm honestly
00:49:24
surprised. Like they they might have been
00:49:27
better off doing that to Craven, honestly.
00:49:32
That is such a mean headline. Craven the Hunter would have
00:49:35
been better as a tax write off. Because it's like, like nobody
00:49:40
saw it. It made no money and it's really
00:49:43
bad. It's just everything about it is
00:49:47
such an anomaly and like like just watching it.
00:49:52
I'm like, what's going on, Sony? Like, what are you make like
00:49:57
making bad movies on purpose. I just don't understand how they
00:50:01
could like, because it was like even like you said, it was like,
00:50:05
you know, you had Morbius, Madam Webb, this.
00:50:08
I think some people kind of liked the Venom movies, but I
00:50:12
think that's almost in spite of themselves because people like
00:50:15
Tom Hardy, you know, and he's, he's like a fun performer.
00:50:19
I mean, they made three of them, so clearly Sony got enough of a
00:50:21
return and Venom's just a bankable enough character that
00:50:26
it was worth doing again. I I would say the downside for
00:50:28
the rest is, I mean, even comic book fans have maybe passing
00:50:33
knowledge of Morbius and Madam Webb, like craving a little bit
00:50:37
more so. But just none of these were
00:50:39
marketable ideas to begin with. It was like bad on paper, bad in
00:50:43
practice. Absolutely, which is shocking
00:50:47
because it's like if somebody came to you and it was like, OK,
00:50:50
we got to make these movies about other Spider Man
00:50:53
characters. We can't use Spider Man.
00:50:56
Like I feel like you could have done better than what they did
00:50:58
like. They're like me personally, I
00:51:00
could have done better. You or really anyone else off
00:51:03
the street? Probably I'd.
00:51:04
Be like, OK, step one, buy the rights to Doctor Morden.
00:51:09
Yes. Like just cause like personally,
00:51:13
I think of the bunch, I I had never heard of Morbius before.
00:51:18
I had never heard of Madam Webb. I, I, I knew Craven, Craven was
00:51:23
at least a character I knew as kind of like a man, like a goofy
00:51:27
like B tier level spider man villain.
00:51:31
But I mean, like, on paper, I kind of like the idea of a
00:51:33
Craving the Hunter movie, you know?
00:51:35
Like I could see that being fun theoretic.
00:51:38
'Cause he's, I guess maybe somebody does not 'cause they
00:51:41
didn't see this awesome movie, they wouldn't know Craven's all
00:51:43
gimmick, 'cause he's like a big game hunter who's hunting for
00:51:46
Spider man 'cause he's like the most dangerous prey.
00:51:49
Like that's his whole thing. He looks like a jungle man.
00:51:52
Yeah, yeah. And I think like, honestly, his
00:51:54
most popular iteration of the character before this and, and
00:51:58
still after this is the is him in the like, the 90s Spider Man
00:52:07
animated series. I think that's where I'm
00:52:10
familiar with the character from.
00:52:12
And like, other people probably would have seen him there too
00:52:14
because I remember him showing up on that show a lot.
00:52:17
Yeah, and even there, it's just like, I mean, it's not that,
00:52:20
it's not like Venom's here or something.
00:52:22
It's just craving. This is like.
00:52:23
He's like a Stiller episode guy. Yeah exactly like this is 1
00:52:27
where the villains, the B plot and the like Spider Man's just
00:52:30
dealing with his life is the main story.
00:52:33
Right, Right. Exactly.
00:52:34
Yeah, yeah. But I mean, all that being said,
00:52:36
like, I think he's kind of a fun character.
00:52:38
Like there's there's definitely something you can do with him.
00:52:43
And yeah, it's you described him correctly too.
00:52:45
He's he's like a big game hunter.
00:52:49
I think he's literally based off that like most dangerous game
00:52:53
book of like, yeah, man hunting man.
00:52:58
Exactly. You know, And man, does he
00:53:02
remind you of that a lot in this movie.
00:53:03
It's like he's cutting like wrestling promos like
00:53:06
throughout. Most of it, it's just like this
00:53:09
Sunday Spider Man at the Fall Brawl.
00:53:13
Yeah, except it's not spider Man.
00:53:14
It's like other random like Rhino is here who's another like
00:53:20
backup villain for Spider man. It's like it's not that serious.
00:53:24
It's it's just. Spider man quick, or I mean,
00:53:29
whatever pace feels good to you Yeah, take.
00:53:32
Your time, you know, whatever. But even that is kind of funny
00:53:38
to me too. Like, 'cause you know, like a
00:53:41
lot of these superhero movies, they have that problem where
00:53:43
it's like your main characters fighting just like an inverse
00:53:47
version of themselves. You know, there's no, there's no
00:53:52
like anti Craven. It's just it's like Craven
00:53:56
versus Rhino. And I'm like OK, this is a solid
00:53:59
mid card match up here. It's a mid card title feud.
00:54:02
Yeah, they're they're going for the Intercontinental belt.
00:54:06
Also, I'm just picturing the antique Craven as like the small
00:54:09
game hunter who's just like I caught a cat.
00:54:13
I. Was going to say he's like
00:54:16
catching bugs. He's just like I got an Ant.
00:54:20
Look at this little guy. Bug Catcher Craven wants to
00:54:23
battle. He's got his shorts.
00:54:29
OK, so Craven is, I get he's not the like they don't, you know,
00:54:35
trying to make him out to be a good guy, right?
00:54:36
He's just the POV character. Oh, no, no, no, they do.
00:54:39
They absolutely do. He's a good cravine.
00:54:41
Yeah, he's a good cravine. He's he's.
00:54:43
A little crave. Yeah, he's just a little guy.
00:54:46
No, he's not. He's he's the they they really
00:54:51
thought they were doing something here.
00:54:52
They were like, this is like going to be our like superhero
00:54:56
Craven. Because also I I didn't look up
00:54:59
the character, I just didn't, didn't care.
00:55:02
But like from what I remember like.
00:55:07
I just want to point out we generally can find a way to be
00:55:11
invested in even the most dumb or boring or incomplete films.
00:55:15
Like we were all in on the Shadow a couple weeks ago.
00:55:18
We were all in on Infoman. It's very telling to me that
00:55:22
both of the films tonight just completely zapped our interest
00:55:25
in our in the form of art that we spend our whole lives talking
00:55:29
about. No, no, you know what?
00:55:31
Hang on, hang on. Let's not get to a nerve.
00:55:33
So I'm sorry. OK, I'm sorry, maybe I'm
00:55:35
overshooting. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:55:36
No, you're, you're, you're still kind of ripe.
00:55:38
Craven is dumb and terrible and bad, but I didn't hate all of it
00:55:43
because it was some of it was kind of funny to me.
00:55:45
OK, OK, well, sorry, let's I'll let you keep going.
00:55:48
I just, I think there's a commonality between the two
00:55:50
movies here. Oh, they're for sure is like, I
00:55:52
think like I was saying towards the end of yours, they both feel
00:55:55
like, I mean, like I was saying it's just I'm just watching this
00:55:58
movie and I'm like, I'm like, this still took a lot of work.
00:56:01
There was still a lot of people that put a lot of effort into
00:56:05
this. And it's so bad.
00:56:08
Like everything about it is awful to the point where it
00:56:12
seems like you're doing it on purpose.
00:56:14
And like I, I'm not 100% convinced that they weren't
00:56:18
because I don't I don't like even the movies you mentioned
00:56:21
where it was like, you know, Morbius got memed on really hard
00:56:25
and then Madam Webb was like kind of diminishing returns on
00:56:28
that. Like it got kind of memed on and
00:56:31
then nobody even like thought about Craven.
00:56:33
He was just completely wasn't even worth the memes.
00:56:36
You know, it's truly just baffling to me.
00:56:40
And I would love to like kind of know what the thought process
00:56:44
was for all of these movies, all these SSU movies, because like
00:56:49
they all look the same. They just have that like washed
00:56:52
out, like bluish, grayish Sony look, you know, Oh.
00:56:57
Yeah, which is admittedly that that goes beyond those borders.
00:57:00
I mean even the trailer for as of recording the trailer for
00:57:02
Brand New Day released recently the new Spiderman movie and that
00:57:05
oddly looks also quite ugly so. But even that has more vibrant
00:57:11
colors than these movies do. The foreground and the
00:57:15
characters have color, Yeah, I guess in that case it's just the
00:57:17
background's always kind of wished like washed out.
00:57:19
But it does look like from the advertising, Craven is devoid of
00:57:22
color and personality, just front to back.
00:57:25
Absolutely. I mean, they'll be like outside
00:57:28
in the middle of the day and it's just like cloudy all the
00:57:31
time. And I'm like, it's just like we
00:57:34
can't have anything nice like it's.
00:57:39
Just anything nice? Yeah, that's kind of yeah,
00:57:43
That's the theme today. It's just like, wow, I came here
00:57:46
to have a nice time and now look what you've done.
00:57:50
It's just so like I, I just like I'll, I'll, I'll get off this in
00:57:54
a second, but I'm just so confused as to why it's so
00:57:58
consistent in terms of this like aesthetic that they have that's
00:58:03
so unappealing and uninteresting and just like seems
00:58:07
intentionally off putting. It's just, it's crazy to me.
00:58:11
But anyway, Craven's a lot of that.
00:58:13
Craven is a lot of that. I'm jumping around a bit here.
00:58:18
But like the, the VFX are also awful.
00:58:23
Like I I after watching the movie I was doing some reading
00:58:27
on it and I saw somebody, I don't remember who it was but
00:58:29
some reviewer was comparing the VFX to like the Scorpion King
00:58:35
like from The Mummy. Returns.
00:58:38
That's harsh. That's really harsh, but it kind
00:58:43
of deserved in this case, like, because there's so much of it.
00:58:47
There's so many. Like, you know, his whole thing
00:58:49
is like, he's like a kind of Tarzan man.
00:58:52
So there's a lot of scenes with like, you know, big animals and
00:58:55
stuff, and they just all look awful.
00:58:58
Like there's one scene where he's like wrestling like a
00:59:01
leopard or something. And I'm like, this is
00:59:04
embarrassing. I feel bad for everyone involved
00:59:06
that had to like film this and then like this is the final
00:59:10
result. Especially because he cut a
00:59:12
promo on the Leopard beforehand. Dude, he did, man.
00:59:18
He's always just like multiple times throughout the movie, he's
00:59:21
like, I'm craving. I'm the best hunter in the
00:59:23
world. You know, I'm going to hunt you
00:59:25
down. Nobody can beat me.
00:59:26
I'll see you later, Rhino. I'm coming for you, Rhino.
00:59:29
Yeah, it's like this Sunday steel page.
00:59:33
Yeah, I'm craving a victory. I was going to get around to the
00:59:39
Craven button, you know, Craven, a better movie or something, but
00:59:42
we'll just, we'll just get that out of the way.
00:59:45
Yeah. Do you think, OK, if the movie
00:59:47
had better marketing, do you think White Castle should have
00:59:50
released a Crave case that was just stickers of Craven the
00:59:53
Hunter all over it? They could have.
00:59:55
I was also going to say it definitely would have.
00:59:57
Of course it would. But I was also going to say
00:59:59
there's a, what is it McDonald's that has a, a cravings menu?
01:00:03
They're going to have the Cravens menu, the.
01:00:05
Cravens menu and it'd be like leopard leopard you can't sell
01:00:08
that leopard Nuggets it's. Not even the Nuggets.
01:00:13
It's like, you know, it's like they just release a whole
01:00:16
leopard into the restaurant and you have to like hunt it down
01:00:18
and kill it yourself and eat it. It's the real Craven experience.
01:00:23
Exactly. It's got to fit the theme
01:00:24
actually. OK, sorry to back up.
01:00:25
I was going to say I didn't look up the character, but from what
01:00:30
I remember from the cartoon version he does not have
01:00:33
superpowers in that he's just like a normal man who uses like
01:00:37
like animal traps and stuff. I could be wrong.
01:00:41
But I don't. He's not like he's comically
01:00:43
strong and fast, but it's supposed to be because he's just
01:00:45
so good. Yes, but in this he has
01:00:49
superpowers that he gets in a very convoluted way because he
01:00:54
gets attacked by a lion. Should I go through the whole
01:00:58
story? Should I tell you what happens
01:01:00
in? Craven I mean, we did this for
01:01:01
Mordred. OK, off the bat, I'm going to
01:01:03
say right now, this is not one of those things where the movie
01:01:06
is so bad that you should go out and spend your time watching it
01:01:09
because it's funny. Mordred is boring.
01:01:11
Craven, from what I can tell, is boring.
01:01:14
So I say we just go through the plot and you can rest easy
01:01:18
knowing that you didn't miss anything.
01:01:20
Yes, yes. So just go.
01:01:25
Through that's already such an insult to the movie, you know,
01:01:29
just like, should I just tell you do.
01:01:32
You just want to know what happened so you don't have to
01:01:35
watch this. So we can all just write this
01:01:37
off. We can all just make this
01:01:38
attacks right off. You know, I'll just make this
01:01:40
attacks right off and they'd be like, do you see Craven?
01:01:41
And you'd be like, alright, well, nobody asked that anyway,
01:01:43
but. Nobody.
01:01:44
Yeah, nobody's asking about that.
01:01:45
That's a weird thing to say. The IRS might come back and be
01:01:48
like, hey, you can get a deduction if you.
01:01:50
Watched Craven. They'd probably audit you.
01:01:52
They'd be like what is this? This isn't a real movie like.
01:01:57
Is this a laundering scheme anyway?
01:02:01
Sorry, yes, please tell me the entire plot.
01:02:05
Yeah, yeah, no, I'm sorry. One more thing.
01:02:07
This this happens in the middle, but this is again, part of his
01:02:09
promo thing. Like they do the whole thing,
01:02:12
which, gosh, there should be like a term for this somewhere.
01:02:16
But it's like, it's like the thing they do in like the Arrow
01:02:18
TV show where they can't just call him like Green Arrow from
01:02:22
the beginning. You know?
01:02:24
It's like everyone throughout the movie just calls him the
01:02:27
Hunter because I think in the comic books he's Craven the
01:02:30
Hunter, you know? Yeah, that's the full name.
01:02:33
Yeah, so they do the the just classic thing where like, oh,
01:02:36
did you hear about the hunter? The Hunter's in the news, you
01:02:38
know, And then there's literally a scene at one point where
01:02:41
another character is like, you know, he's like, oh, so you're
01:02:44
the hunter. And he's like, I prefer Craven
01:02:47
with AK and I'm like, shut the hell up, you did not just he.
01:02:49
Says with AK. Yes, yes, that is the Oh my God.
01:02:55
That is character assassination. How are you supposed to be cool?
01:03:00
Like he has to, there's a time out corner and Mordred's in it
01:03:03
and Kraven's on his way over because that's awful.
01:03:08
It is. It really is.
01:03:09
But it's kind of funny. I'm like, this is so dumb.
01:03:12
I kind of like it. That would have been the meme
01:03:14
actually, if people had seen the movie, I guarantee you it would
01:03:16
have been like with AK, like it would have been the whole, you
01:03:19
know. Oh yeah, totally, totally.
01:03:21
Because it it's ridiculous. It's a silly thing to ever say
01:03:24
out loud. And the bar for that has really
01:03:29
moved a lot in recent years for what you can just confidently
01:03:32
say out loud and not be seen as a big idiot with AK.
01:03:39
Yeah, yes, yeah. So I can trademark it later.
01:03:45
Yeah, exactly for the charge. Royalties for other people to
01:03:48
say it with AK. That's his whole, that's his
01:03:53
whole game plan, that's his, that's his superhero plan is to
01:03:55
sue people. So anyway, anyway to get into
01:04:03
what I was trying to say, the man has super powers, right?
01:04:06
That he gets because the beginning of the movie there's a
01:04:13
whole opening sequence where he like, kills a guy in a prison.
01:04:16
And that's just to be like, look at this guy, you know, he can do
01:04:20
all these things. Look at him.
01:04:23
Look at him. Whatever.
01:04:25
So there's that's like the opening sequence of the movie.
01:04:28
And then we get to a flashback that goes on for like way too
01:04:31
long where it's like young Craven and his brother and their
01:04:34
dad, who's played by Russell Crowe, and he's just God awful
01:04:39
in this movie, Okay. He just just so you know, he's
01:04:42
just terrible. So.
01:04:44
Just your average like 20 tens and onward Russell Crowe
01:04:46
performance then. Yeah, literally not even trying
01:04:49
at all. He's doing a Russian accent,
01:04:51
which is. He's doing it.
01:04:52
It is there. It's there.
01:04:55
They didn't ask him to, he just showed up to set doing a Russian
01:04:57
accent. Yeah, they're like, oh, shoot, I
01:04:59
guess we got to, I guess they're Russian now.
01:05:00
All the characters, we've got to change all their names to
01:05:02
Russian names. OK, so he goes to see Russian
01:05:06
Russell Crowe. Well, so, so Russell Crowe, he
01:05:09
picks he picks little baby Raven and his brother up from school
01:05:13
and like a limo, you know, he's like rich evil dad and he's
01:05:17
like, what's reminding me this is, isn't it like an SNL bit?
01:05:23
I think where you would you would used to say it sometimes
01:05:25
we'd be just be like your dad's dead.
01:05:28
It's like, do you remember that? Wait, what?
01:05:32
Your dad. Or is this your dad's dead?
01:05:35
That's not the bid from Steel, right?
01:05:36
Where he's like her father's dead.
01:05:38
No, no, this is older than that. I don't know.
01:05:40
This is this just was reminding me of because the the dialogue
01:05:42
is just that blunt. Like he just picks them up in
01:05:44
this limo and he's basically just like your mom's dead.
01:05:47
And they're like, oh, OK. And he's like, we're going to go
01:05:50
hunting now to like, get over it, I guess.
01:05:53
And they're like that. OK, that doesn't sound fun, but
01:05:55
whatever. That does sound vaguely
01:05:59
familiar, like Craven Laura, because he's also in the sequel
01:06:05
to the PlayStation Spider Man game, like the newer ones.
01:06:10
So you, you fight Craven. And I do recall there's
01:06:12
something about that, like it's a family dynamics thing with
01:06:17
him. Yeah, that's the thing.
01:06:19
Everyone's always trying to make Craven happen.
01:06:21
Like what? Like what I was reading in the,
01:06:24
you know, production for this movie is that like, he was
01:06:27
supposed there was like plans at several points for him to appear
01:06:31
in previous Spider Man projects that just never came to
01:06:33
fruition. And at one point, like, he was
01:06:36
going to be in Black Panther, like the Marvel Black Panther
01:06:39
was going to have like, Craven in it.
01:06:42
And it just always fell through until they made this movie.
01:06:47
I wouldn't have hated him in black.
01:06:49
I wonder if it would have been though.
01:06:50
Like would he have been like what Andy Serkis's character
01:06:53
ended up being? I don't know.
01:06:56
I don't know. I think he, I think it was like
01:07:00
he was going to maybe fight Black Panther or something.
01:07:03
Was was part of the plan? Maybe that would have been like
01:07:05
Black Panther too because they ended up putting like Neymour in
01:07:08
there. I think he could have done it
01:07:09
crazy anyway. Yeah, so anyway, this the story
01:07:14
though like we're. Getting kind of far away.
01:07:19
Back in what they're doing in this movie, like Russell Crowe,
01:07:23
it takes them out to go like him and his brother to go hunting
01:07:26
and he says they're hunting a lion that has killed 3000
01:07:32
people. Like what?
01:07:36
One lion killed 3000. That doesn't make any sense.
01:07:40
That's crazy. But that's what they're there
01:07:42
for. And so anyway, what happens is
01:07:44
this lion like at some point he attacks Craven and like he like
01:07:51
attacks him and like carries him away.
01:07:54
But like the lion is like bleeding cause like one of the
01:07:57
hunters like shot it. And so like his, the lion's
01:08:00
blood make like drips into one of the open wounds that Raven
01:08:05
Craven with K has and mixes with his blood.
01:08:10
And I'm like, OK, he gets his superpowers from this super lion
01:08:15
or something. But then there's like another
01:08:17
character who, like, we've barely seen at this point in the
01:08:21
movie, who she shows up because, like, her grandmother was like a
01:08:26
Mystic of some kind and gave her this, like potion.
01:08:29
And she like, finds Craven after the lion, like, leaves him there
01:08:34
and she like, gives him this Mystic potion.
01:08:38
And like, somehow the combination of this potion and
01:08:42
the lion's blood is what gives him his, like, animal
01:08:44
superpowers. So it's very convoluted.
01:08:48
That is convolute. If it was already a like a magic
01:08:51
lion, you could have just had to be magic Lion's blood.
01:08:56
Right. But and then it's also like then
01:08:58
he has these like other powers that have nothing to do with a
01:09:01
lion. Like sometimes he runs around on
01:09:04
all fours and he has like super strength and durability and like
01:09:07
speed and stuff like that. But he also has like eagle
01:09:10
vision, like he can like see really far away.
01:09:12
Oh. Like Assassin's Creed?
01:09:15
I guess. But I'm like, what does that
01:09:16
have to do with a lion? Like, it's like you just have
01:09:20
random animal powers now and he can like talk to animals and
01:09:24
like, it's, it's just like, why, why, Why'd you do the whole
01:09:28
lion's blood thing? Like why Lion?
01:09:30
And and the magic potion like just do one or the other.
01:09:35
You know what we were talking about?
01:09:37
Referencing things no one remembers?
01:09:38
He is. He's basically copying
01:09:41
Bravestar. Dude, OK, I'm glad you mentioned
01:09:44
that because there is at one point Rhino when he's because
01:09:50
again, they're all just cutting like wrestling promos on each
01:09:52
other the whole time. Like when Rhino is talking about
01:09:55
him, he literally like goes into like that same way of speaking
01:10:00
where he's like he's got the speed of a lion and the strength
01:10:04
of a Puma or whatever. I'm just like, Oh my God.
01:10:08
He describes him the same way. Bravestar was like in the same
01:10:11
animation style and I think it was out around the same time as
01:10:15
the original. Like he man and she rock
01:10:16
cartoons like those like 80s Funimation cartoons.
01:10:20
And we would sometimes stay up because they aired in this like
01:10:22
late night block when we were growing up years later.
01:10:25
But then they would always be ads for the other shows.
01:10:27
And there was just this 122nd Bravestar ad that was just
01:10:31
burned into my brain that was exactly that.
01:10:33
It was like strength of a lion, speed of a Puma.
01:10:35
Like, I guess that's Craven. That's great.
01:10:38
And that's exactly how like he even says it like that, like the
01:10:41
same way that they would say it like on that commercial.
01:10:44
And I'm like, OK, he's just doing that.
01:10:47
I guess like, but that's what's, I guess kind of fun, if anything
01:10:52
in this movie is fun. It's kind of like the action
01:10:56
sequences because he's on, he's got like those superpowers that
01:10:59
I would say like are sort of on the level of like a Captain
01:11:01
America. Like, you know, where he's, he's
01:11:05
running around and like punching and kicking people, but he's got
01:11:08
like just super strength. But he's not like the Hulk where
01:11:12
he's like ripping buildings out of the ground or something.
01:11:15
They do at one point, like completely RIP off that scene
01:11:18
though, where Captain America is like holding on to the
01:11:20
helicopter, like Craven's trying to stop a helicopter from like
01:11:25
flying away from this like port. And I'm like this, this is just,
01:11:30
you're just doing the same thing.
01:11:31
You just you can't just like copy the homework directly
01:11:34
Craven like you have to just. Change a few things.
01:11:36
Yeah, especially because, like, don't try to put him on the
01:11:40
level of Catherine. Like this is literally
01:11:42
contrasting one of the most successful live action Marvel
01:11:46
character ventures with what is, by the numbers, the worst one
01:11:49
ever. You know, it's one of the worst
01:11:52
ones. And it's also just for the time
01:11:55
it came out. I mean, again, this came out
01:11:57
December like the very end of 2024.
01:12:01
And it's just everything about it is just the most like generic
01:12:06
superhero stuff you've ever seen, you know, to the point
01:12:09
where I'm like, nobody wants this now.
01:12:11
Like if you do superhero stuff now, it has to be subversive in
01:12:15
some way or like something new and interesting in the genre
01:12:20
because you know, people have been talking about it.
01:12:23
People have been talking about how tired they are of it for
01:12:26
forever. That which just goes to show you
01:12:27
how long it's been around and been this kind of prominent like
01:12:31
genre and this just like it literally does the thing which I
01:12:36
I didn't even like consider this because it like the whole time
01:12:43
he's wearing like modern chic Craven, you know, like his like
01:12:49
costume throughout the movie, he has sort of like a costume.
01:12:52
He's a handsome Craven, OK, He's, you know, Yes.
01:12:54
It's trendy. Yeah.
01:12:56
But he's got like this like vest thing on.
01:12:58
He almost looks like the Prince of Persia a little bit.
01:13:01
Yep. And so I'm like, whatever, this
01:13:03
is just the character design they went with for this, you
01:13:05
know, Craven, but they literally do the final scene of the movie,
01:13:09
the final shot of the movie is him putting on like the vintage
01:13:14
like Craven vest that has like the lion's mane on it.
01:13:19
And I was like, you got it. I despise that that might have
01:13:22
even come up this season already.
01:13:23
That's my least favorite comic book movie trope of all time is
01:13:28
the convoluted how do we get you into the corny original costume
01:13:33
so that we can say it's dumb or say nowadays it's not dumb, it's
01:13:36
actually super cool? What?
01:13:38
Yeah, there's that. But then there's also the I
01:13:40
think there was like, I don't know how many people would be
01:13:43
familiar with this, but I think the shorthand for this type of
01:13:46
thing I've seen being referenced as like a surf monkey.
01:13:51
I think. I don't know if you've heard
01:13:53
this before. No.
01:13:55
It was like a famous like tweet or something, like something
01:13:58
that went viral where somebody was basically describing this
01:14:01
sort of like modern thing that they do with these types of
01:14:04
movies where they were like if a movie came out in the 90s called
01:14:07
Surf Monkey, the whole movie from beginning to end, you would
01:14:10
see a monkey surfing. But if it came out now, it would
01:14:14
be like the whole movie would be like leading up to him getting
01:14:18
his surfboard and like he would only like surf in like the final
01:14:22
scene of the movie, you know, like.
01:14:24
That is pretty apartment, yeah. Yeah, yeah.
01:14:28
It's like, I think it made more sense.
01:14:31
It it works if the audience is already hooked when they get in
01:14:35
the door and you're teasing something so that you can hold
01:14:38
their interest until a certain point and then kind of release
01:14:41
all that built up anticipation. But if you're all the way down
01:14:44
in the in the dumpster digging out Craven the hunter, like
01:14:47
nobody cares enough. There's no super fans for Craven
01:14:51
where you can like release a teaser of the hooded jacket and
01:14:56
be like, Oh my goodness, I can't wait for that part.
01:14:58
Like you have to lead with the interesting part if this
01:15:02
audience is not already sold on the character.
01:15:05
Absolutely, and this might be the most absurd iteration of it
01:15:08
I've ever seen. Because a like the poster and
01:15:12
the advertising, what little of it there is, shows him wearing
01:15:16
the lion's mane like classic Craven look So and like, so it's
01:15:22
in the advertising, even though it's literally just the last
01:15:24
scene of the movie and it's so barely different from what he's
01:15:27
already wearing throughout the rest of the movie that I'm like,
01:15:29
well, who cares? This, this doesn't look any more
01:15:32
or less absurd or unique than what you were already wearing.
01:15:36
So like, what are we even doing? Like in the context of the
01:15:41
story, did they act like this matters to Craven or is it
01:15:43
literally just oh here's my other outfit?
01:15:46
They do. So the lion that, like, attacked
01:15:50
him, that he kind of got his superpowers from his dad, Like,
01:15:55
afterwards, like, went and, like, killed the lion, like, had
01:15:59
it haunted and killed and then, like, gave it to Craven is like
01:16:04
a gift. And Craven got all mad.
01:16:05
And he was like, they should have killed you and put you up
01:16:09
on the wall. And so then like, yeah, yeah,
01:16:14
that's the dialogue we're dealing with here.
01:16:16
And so the end of the movie, I guess, is like, I don't even
01:16:20
know what you're supposed to feel because like, let's just
01:16:23
skip all the way to the end. Yeah, we tried.
01:16:26
We listen. We tried going through the
01:16:27
story. Not worthwhile.
01:16:28
Let's just go all the way to the.
01:16:30
End. Let's just go right to the end.
01:16:31
The end of the movie is is again so dumb.
01:16:35
But like Craven finds out that like his dad actually like
01:16:40
betrayed him and like set him up so that the Rhino would go after
01:16:44
him because the rhino was one of his dad's like rivals in the
01:16:49
criminal underground. And so like Craven like
01:16:52
confronts his dad about this and it seems like it seems like he's
01:16:58
going to like kind of make peace with him and just be like move
01:17:01
on with his life. But then as he's like walking
01:17:04
away, because Craven, they're doing their you know, he's like
01:17:07
he's the superhero, but he's based on a villain character.
01:17:09
So they're trying to make him like this like cool antihero
01:17:11
guy. But Craven just like walks away
01:17:14
and and says some like one liner and then like a bear just runs
01:17:17
out of the jungle and like kills his dad and it's like.
01:17:21
What? Not even, huh?
01:17:24
Yeah, not even a lion. So I'm like, what?
01:17:25
That's just a random bear. That you called Lion, that's a
01:17:28
good point. Yeah.
01:17:29
But then the scene immediately after that, he like, goes back
01:17:33
to his old house that he was at with his dad.
01:17:36
And his dad had like, left him something and he left him this
01:17:39
like emotional note and like was like, this is who you are.
01:17:44
And then like what he pulls out of this case is like the the
01:17:48
lion that had attacked him. His dad had had it turned into
01:17:51
that vest. And then he like puts that on
01:17:54
and I'm like, you just had your dad killed by a random bear and
01:17:58
now you're like, I don't get what this is supposed to imply
01:18:01
at all that now you're that he gave you this gift.
01:18:04
Unless it's some stupid like, alpha thing of like, you know,
01:18:10
his dad's proud that he killed him because it means he's a man.
01:18:14
Maybe that was the kind of rhetoric that his dad was
01:18:17
spouting throughout the movie was like, you know, you got to
01:18:19
be a man or whatever. Like, nothing thematic about
01:18:24
that. Literally just a random bear.
01:18:26
He's just like that. Random bear.
01:18:27
So strange, yeah. Maybe he didn't even send the
01:18:30
bear and just really successfully played it off.
01:18:32
Like he was like, yeah, Bear right where I was going next.
01:18:37
Yeah, yeah, maybe, maybe, maybe just like starts like running
01:18:41
away slowly. Just like just runs away crying.
01:18:45
I still dare for the cage. Just like so silly.
01:18:52
But yeah, like this, this was the worst version of that like
01:18:57
surf monkey type thing I've ever seen.
01:18:58
Because I'm like this. This means nothing.
01:19:02
You're not going to get a sequel.
01:19:03
They look so similar to what you're already wearing that I
01:19:06
can't stress that enough. Like, you could have just been
01:19:08
wearing this from the beginning, and it wouldn't have looked any
01:19:10
more or less out of place. And that's how the movie ends.
01:19:14
I mean, that's like the last shot of the movie is him putting
01:19:17
that on. And I was just like, OK, if you
01:19:21
say so. OK, so that Jesus.
01:19:23
So that's the climactic thing for the character of Craven.
01:19:27
As far as like action set piece, I assume we focus on him beating
01:19:31
Rhino. Is that like the end of the
01:19:33
third act? Yes, yes.
01:19:35
And he beats Rhino by they're in like an open field.
01:19:42
I think I want to say maybe somewhere in Africa.
01:19:46
I they don't think they specify exactly where they are, but
01:19:50
they're in an open field. He's getting beat up by Rhino
01:19:54
and like there's like a car that got flipped over and it has like
01:19:57
some kind of like wire thing on the back, like some kind of like
01:20:00
tow cable or something. And again, Raven like Craven, I
01:20:05
keep calling him Raven Craven with AK that's.
01:20:08
So Craven. That's so Craven, like summons
01:20:12
like a horde of Buffalo and like like wraps one end of the wire
01:20:18
around Rhino and then like lassos of one of the Buffalo in
01:20:22
the horde. And then they like pull Rhino
01:20:24
away and like trample him and that somehow beats him, even
01:20:27
though like Rhino's whole thing throughout the movie is that he
01:20:29
has this like unbreakable skin. So I was like, why did that
01:20:32
work? But.
01:20:33
Why did that? Whatever, I guess.
01:20:36
I feel like the angle for that would be you'd have to like
01:20:37
suffocate him or something. Maybe that was too violent.
01:20:41
No, yeah, there is. There is a bit where it's like
01:20:45
the rhino. He he has like a human form, but
01:20:48
to like stay in his human form, he has to kind of like
01:20:51
constantly be injecting himself with this like serum.
01:20:55
So he has like a little like metal like cylinder hole in his
01:21:01
abdomen that he like plugs the the serum thing into.
01:21:06
And like while Craven is fighting him, he like can't do
01:21:08
any damage to him because he has this unbreakable skin.
01:21:11
But like then he notices that he has that little thing and he
01:21:15
like stabs him in there directly and that like hurts rhino.
01:21:20
But then it's it's the the Buffalo Stampede that really
01:21:22
takes him out. So.
01:21:24
Much. OK, so you're saying there's a
01:21:26
you're saying that there's a small exhaust port only a few
01:21:29
meters wide, and that's how we have to beat the rhino?
01:21:33
Exactly, but it'd be like if they like did that to the Death
01:21:35
Star and then and then had a trample.
01:21:38
Run over by a bunch of Buffalo, Yeah, that's what really saved
01:21:43
the day. Yeah, yeah.
01:21:46
I will say I was not picturing Rhino as like organic Rhino
01:21:50
because I I think my visual reference is still when he pops
01:21:54
in at the end of Amazing Spider Man. 2.
01:21:58
As like a guy in a robot suit and I was picturing a robot.
01:22:00
I was picturing Paul Giamatti in a robot suit this whole time.
01:22:03
So it kind of now I'm like, OK, this is an organic rhino thing.
01:22:08
Cool, right. And those are Sony Spider Man
01:22:12
movies that are like inexplicably unrelated to any of
01:22:16
these other Sony, what is it, Sony Spider Man universe?
01:22:21
That would have been the best pivot for them because Tom
01:22:24
Holland Spider Man has basically not been in any of these Sony
01:22:29
Spider Man movies. So if you made this like 6th
01:22:31
1:00 and then used this to reintroduce Andrew Garfield,
01:22:34
Spider Man, that would have saved everything.
01:22:36
People liked him when he came back to do No Way Home.
01:22:41
So you could have just been like, whatever this is, this is
01:22:44
his one. And then we'll just plug him
01:22:45
back in here and nobody cares. Nobody sees these anyway.
01:22:48
Well, so again, apparently it what from what I was reading
01:22:51
before they went with the whole multiverse angle for that movie.
01:22:55
Craven was going to be the bad guy in that movie in the No Way
01:22:57
Home. So it's.
01:22:59
Just like interesting. I think by the time, by the time
01:23:03
you reach Craven, you're out of juice.
01:23:05
That's just like any, any version of this.
01:23:09
If you have hit the point in your rogues gallery where you're
01:23:13
like, I don't know, Craven, like just turn off the whole
01:23:16
operation. And I think Sony actually did.
01:23:18
So credit to them for that. Yeah, yeah.
01:23:21
Well I think multiple of these movies have also tried to
01:23:24
introduce the Sinister 6, which I believe he's a part of.
01:23:28
I mean, I think the the roster of the sinister 6 changes all
01:23:31
the time, so I assumed whatever 6 people they had would have
01:23:34
been, yeah, their sinister team. Yeah, but no, you're right.
01:23:38
I mean, this ended it. This was the end of the SSU for
01:23:42
whatever it was, whatever it accomplished other than it's
01:23:45
embarrassing itself like. I, I I'm sure they would have
01:23:50
done it. I'm sure if they made just
01:23:51
enough money, they would have had Craven, Morbius, Michael
01:23:56
Keaton, Falcon, who somehow crossed universes in the middle
01:23:59
of it. Or not Falcon, Vulture.
01:24:02
Sorry. And then what would it be Orbius
01:24:06
Craven? Oh, venom.
01:24:08
Venom, of course, probably would have been like the lead.
01:24:11
Madam Webb, what do we got? Madam Webb maybe.
01:24:15
I think Dakota Johnson really did not want to be in that movie
01:24:17
and it showed. So I don't know if they would
01:24:18
have asked her to do it again. But then we could have had an
01:24:22
even higher budget, like $300 million Sony flop.
01:24:27
I guess that's up to us. I think we're going to have to.
01:24:29
We're going to have to map this out.
01:24:32
We're going to have to put Craven in.
01:24:33
I think we can sneak Mordred in because who's paying attention?
01:24:37
Right. Yeah, Yeah.
01:24:39
Well, I mean, it's also like, just again, another thing that
01:24:42
people have been like vocally, like critical of is when they
01:24:47
are like making these movies where they take a character
01:24:50
who's a villain and then just be like, never mind they're the
01:24:53
hero now. Like just because they're our
01:24:55
POV character, like now they're automatically a good guy.
01:24:58
I think people were saying they did that with like the Cruella
01:25:00
Deville movie, like with Emma Stone.
01:25:03
Oh yeah, she was oppressed or something.
01:25:05
Right, right. And like this movie like their
01:25:08
way of doing it is like it's R rated and they just like have
01:25:11
the most embarrassing like like they swear like teenagers trying
01:25:15
to act cool, you know, like that's how the dialogue comes
01:25:17
off. Yep, like so it's just like it's
01:25:22
like it hits every possible misstep.
01:25:26
This like super late in the game superhero movie that just does
01:25:30
the traditional like origin story formula, does the whole
01:25:34
costume thing at the end, the surf monkey of it all like takes
01:25:38
the villain character and makes him a good guy.
01:25:40
Like it's just like you couldn't have like, tripped over more
01:25:45
things along the way while making this movie.
01:25:48
Not to mention the lack of leopard Nuggets as we discussed.
01:25:52
Leopard Nuggets, Yeah. No, you got to make the Nuggets
01:25:54
yourself. That's part of the appeal.
01:25:55
Of the Nuggets. The Craven's menu.
01:25:59
Menu available nowhere for a limited.
01:26:08
All right, well, that that does it for Craven the Hunter 2024
01:26:13
and Doctor Mordred 1992. We move now into final scores
01:26:18
and wrap up. We're going to see who's blind
01:26:20
movie pick for this episode was better and that's who is the
01:26:23
winner for tonight. Frank, I'll go first because I
01:26:25
started with Doctor Mordred. I set off the bat in that review
01:26:30
barely a movie and I I hold to that and I think that's
01:26:34
uncontestable that this is uncontestable.
01:26:38
Barely a film. You cannot it barely would have
01:26:41
worked as ATV pilot like nothing happens.
01:26:45
They're so I'll confident in their material that they just
01:26:47
stretch everything. The only things I'll say that
01:26:51
maybe we're not properly conveyed is that the
01:26:53
performances are perfectly serviceable.
01:26:55
Geoffrey Combs and Brian Thompson, we both said, are like
01:26:57
Star Trek alum, you know, actors and they know how to just
01:27:02
deliver nonsense material in a kind of straightforward, like
01:27:05
self serious manner. So nobody's out here bombing,
01:27:08
making things worse. Also, compared to Craven, I
01:27:11
think you would prefer watching Doctor Mordred because it was
01:27:15
shot in the 90s and so they actually had to like light
01:27:17
scenes, you know what I mean? Like it has shadows and a color
01:27:22
palette and like set design and those things had to be decided
01:27:26
before they made the movie instead of after.
01:27:29
So Mordred has a a nice kind of lived in quality to it, whereas
01:27:33
Craven sounds very featureless and kind of like artificial.
01:27:39
So all of that said, I think Doctor Mordred gets a three out
01:27:42
of 10. OK, good.
01:27:45
The dreaded 3. The dreaded Grifters 3.
01:27:48
The Grifters 3 I almost went lower because we've talked
01:27:51
before about like, what would it take?
01:27:53
And one of the things we mentioned is like something
01:27:54
that's not even really a movie. And Margaret, it crept real
01:27:57
close. But I will say that it was
01:28:00
harmless. And so it it can stay at a
01:28:02
three. Yeah, yeah.
01:28:04
That's fair. That's totally fair.
01:28:07
All right, over to you. Oh.
01:28:09
Gosh, this is this is a tough decision.
01:28:16
I feel like I I got very little out of.
01:28:18
I got very, very little to take away from it.
01:28:21
But I wasn't like, I wasn't like upset watching it.
01:28:26
It was like, you know, when you like, like eat junk food, right?
01:28:30
And then you're like like halfway through and you're like,
01:28:35
I really shouldn't be eating this, but I'm, I'm just like,
01:28:37
I'm gonna finish, you know? Like I already made the bad
01:28:41
decision, I'll just follow through.
01:28:43
Yeah, yeah, that's, that's what and it's like.
01:28:46
And it doesn't even really taste that because sometimes this
01:28:48
tastes really good, this junk food, But right, It's not even a
01:28:50
good one today, you know, like, what are we even doing here?
01:28:53
That's the worst. That's yeah, when you get your
01:28:55
like fast food take out and then you're mostly just want
01:28:58
something predictable and then they mess it up somehow and
01:29:00
you're like, ah, they put Mayo on this and leopard.
01:29:04
And Leopard. Yeah, I didn't ask for Leopard
01:29:06
on this cravings menu. Specifically said no Leopard.
01:29:12
It's just again, it's a whole leopard just sitting on top of
01:29:14
your padding. No, I'm following.
01:29:18
I'm tracking. That is how Craven came across
01:29:20
was a a little treat that ended up not even being a good.
01:29:25
Yeah, yeah. But again, I didn't like
01:29:29
outright hate it. There's there's there's there
01:29:31
have been movies that we've watched for the show where I'm
01:29:33
like, oof, this is like upsetting, man.
01:29:38
So I don't know, like I'm, I'm floating between 2 numbers and I
01:29:44
think I'm going to give Craven a four.
01:29:45
I, I almost, yeah, I almost gave it a three, which we would have
01:29:50
tied, which I don't know if that's ever happened before.
01:29:52
We do not have a, we don't have a play for a tie.
01:29:55
I don't know how we would handle.
01:29:56
Protocol for that, yeah. But yeah, I think, I think it's
01:30:01
a four just because like, you know, whatever.
01:30:05
I'm I'm impressed. I think we've been harsher than
01:30:08
that to other films. Like I gave double impact of
01:30:12
four a long ways back, which is like a Jean-Claude Van Damme
01:30:14
movie, and that one had a little bit going for it.
01:30:17
It certainly sounds better than Craven, but I will say it, it
01:30:20
takes a lot to go all the way down to a three.
01:30:23
It does. And I feel like, yeah, there's,
01:30:25
we're going to be a little inconsistent in this scoring
01:30:27
sometimes maybe a little change over time.
01:30:29
But like you said, I I just would be very hard pressed to
01:30:33
give anything like lower than a three first of all.
01:30:37
We've done it once. We we did it for sphere.
01:30:41
Yeah, yeah, Sphere earned that. But yeah, I mean, we'll see.
01:30:46
We'll we'll get into that ones and zeros like at some point I
01:30:50
imagine. Probably going to happen.
01:30:52
OK Raven the Hunter gets a four. That is an over performance.
01:30:56
Good on him. Yeah, it's just junk food.
01:31:01
Not good junk food. Just just, you know, a bad
01:31:04
leopard burger. I guess it's a lion in the
01:31:08
story. They keep stressing them.
01:31:09
It's a lion. But we both went completely in a
01:31:12
leopard. Yeah, exactly.
01:31:18
Yeah. OK.
01:31:20
Craven's A4. Mordre's a three.
01:31:23
That means that, Frank, once again, I have won the episode.
01:31:26
You did win last time, but I have one more episode so far
01:31:29
this season, widening the overall score totals a little
01:31:33
bit. We do try to keep track of all
01:31:34
of those scores out of 10 and kind of make it part of our
01:31:37
season standings. So you've got a long way to go
01:31:39
still. But we do have, I think, two
01:31:42
more superhero episodes in us before we wrap this idea up, so
01:31:46
we'll see. Anything could happen.
01:31:48
Anything could happen. I could win them all.
01:31:51
That could happen. I could win them all, that would
01:31:52
help. Probably right?
01:31:56
OK, so because I won tonight's episode by a thin margin, I'll
01:32:00
go first for our pick for next time.
01:32:02
So Frank, I already had this one locked and loaded.
01:32:06
I would like you to watch 1982's Swamp Thing.
01:32:11
Swamp Thing. Swamp Thing.
01:32:14
Sounds like you're saying Swamp Thing like that thing from Mario
01:32:18
close. Swamp Thing, which is I think I
01:32:23
I did not double check this before we recorded.
01:32:26
I think it's technically ADC property.
01:32:29
Yeah, that's that sounds kind of familiar actually.
01:32:31
You might be right about that. However, what's notable about
01:32:34
1982 Swamp Thing A It's billed as a straight up horror film,
01:32:37
which we don't really often cover.
01:32:40
I imagine it will not be like actually that upsetting, which
01:32:42
is good, just just kind of like an action horror.
01:32:46
And it was directed by Wes Craven.
01:32:50
Oh, all right. Who would go on to do the God, I
01:32:55
hope I'm saying the right one the The Nightmare on Elm Street
01:32:59
movies? He's done a lot.
01:33:01
He's he's been involved with several like horror franchises.
01:33:05
But yeah, I believe Nightmare on Elm.
01:33:07
Street he did Freddy Krueger's and he did scream the original
01:33:11
1, but this I think predates all of those.
01:33:13
This is like earlier in his career.
01:33:15
Wes Craven. Cool.
01:33:17
Yeah, that's awesome. Swamp Thing.
01:33:19
Now is is is Swamp Thing? Is he the superhero in this
01:33:22
story? I think so.
01:33:23
There was a sequel made in 1989 and the poster art for that one
01:33:28
says like refers to him as a superhero.
01:33:31
All right. Counts.
01:33:33
I could have given you that one that's arguably a more forgotten
01:33:36
film, but why? Why start with the sequel?
01:33:37
We'll just do 1982 Swamp Thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:33:41
That's fair. OK, over to you.
01:33:43
What? What would you like me to watch
01:33:44
for next time? You are going to watch 2000
01:33:49
eighteens, Fast color. Fast color.
01:33:55
I got to write this down or I will forget.
01:33:57
Yeah, Fast color, which I think is like a movie.
01:34:02
It's like a real movie. Hold on, you tell me it's one of
01:34:07
those beginning, middles and ends type movies.
01:34:09
I think it might be. I think it might be.
01:34:13
It's his character. Funny.
01:34:15
Yeah. It seems like you're trying to,
01:34:16
like, sell me, like, drugs under a bridge, but you're just like,
01:34:19
what's the real stuff? I got the real stuff this time.
01:34:21
Pretty good, pretty good. I've steered you wrong every
01:34:24
single other time, but not this time.
01:34:27
Not last week. I won last week, so that's true.
01:34:30
OK, fast cut. Anything you want to tell me in
01:34:32
advance about fast color? No.
01:34:40
OK, we'll just leave it at that then.
01:34:47
OK, That's it. It's a total mystery.
01:34:50
Stay tuned. No, we're done.
01:34:51
We're not OK. All.
01:34:54
Right, why not? Why not have a bit of mystery in
01:34:56
our lives? So join us next time, not in two
01:34:59
weeks, but in four weeks because we have a bonus in between.
01:35:01
In four weeks time we are going to be talking about Swamp Thing,
01:35:05
which I told you about in detail and explained and fast color,
01:35:09
which could be literally anything.
01:35:12
They could even be craving the hunter.
01:35:14
It could be, it might be. He spells fast with AK.
01:35:19
That's just wrong. That's just incorrect.
01:35:22
Where'd that bear come from? Where'd that bear come from?
01:35:25
OK, well that'll be it. Frank.
01:35:28
I want to move quickly into thanking everybody for listening
01:35:32
to tonight's episode of Meet Your Double Feature.
01:35:34
If you enjoyed the episode tonight, please give us a like
01:35:38
give us a rating of follow. We really appreciate that
01:35:40
support and helps us climb the charts and helps other people
01:35:43
find the show. So please consider giving us
01:35:46
that support if you enjoyed the program.
01:35:48
Also, if you would like to follow the show on social media,
01:35:51
you can find us on Instagram at Meet your double feature or on
01:35:55
Blue Sky at mydf pod. Or if you would like the quick
01:36:00
links to all of our socials as well as all of our new episodes,
01:36:03
you can just visit our website at Meet your Double feature dot
01:36:06
com. And then Frank, as of recently,
01:36:09
as of our guest episode, we can now officially say that your
01:36:11
movie Nate and Mariah in Venice is available to rent or purchase
01:36:15
through Amazon Prime Video, which is super cool.
01:36:18
That is super cool so. Go check it out, it's pretty
01:36:21
good. Frank made a movie he Co
01:36:23
produced. He was the cinematographer.
01:36:26
It looks a heck of a lot better than Craven the Hunter, I can
01:36:28
tell you that. We can only hope.
01:36:31
We can only. Hope it has colors framing some
01:36:34
degree of intentionality. Yeah, no rhinos unfortunately.
01:36:38
Or. Leopards.
01:36:39
Rhinos to my knowledge. Unfortunate, but shot entirely
01:36:42
on the occasion in Venice. It is a romantic drama written
01:36:45
and directed by Austin Bulky who we had on the show last time and
01:36:48
Co produced by our very own Frank.
01:36:49
Please go check it out. That is all of our links,
01:36:53
programming notes. One last thing.
01:36:55
So our next episode after this Frank exciting news.
01:36:59
By popular demand, we are bringing back our side series
01:37:02
ranking every movie ever made. I think about that.
01:37:06
I like that one. I like it too, I'm a part of it.
01:37:13
I think it turned out pretty good.
01:37:15
It's good, I like it. That was a surprise hit for us.
01:37:19
I wanted to do that as sort of just an idea if you didn't catch
01:37:22
our first episode. What Frank and I are doing in
01:37:24
this little side bonus series is we are pulling movies out of a
01:37:27
hat that one or both of us has seen and ranking them on one
01:37:30
complete list of every movie ever released from best to
01:37:34
worst, which is an ongoing project that we will jump in
01:37:37
with periodically. So that is what you will get
01:37:39
from us in two weeks time and then two weeks following that on
01:37:41
Thursday, that's when we will hear about Swamp Thing and our
01:37:45
mystery film. Yeah, it's a mystery film now.
01:37:50
It's a mystery. Maybe not the movie, but what it
01:37:53
is, is a mystery. Yeah.
01:37:56
OK. Thanks so much again for joining
01:37:57
us. Frank is going to close us out
01:37:59
today by going over the plot details and summary of Fast
01:38:03
Color. And as soon as he starts
01:38:04
talking, I'm going to cut him off and play the outro music.
01:38:07
So in spider writers, they write these like really big spiders.
01:38:24
Coming up next. It's.
01:38:26
Swamp Thing followed by Fast Color on Meet Your Double
01:38:31
feature.